Winning An Argument Comic Strips - Page 3
105 Results for Winning An Argument
View 21 - 30 results for winning an argument comic strips. Discover the best "Winning An Argument" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share December 01, 2013's comic on:
CEO: I'm proud to announce the winner in the CEO's technology challenge. Two weeks ago, I challenged you to come up with innovative ideas for getting fresh water to Elbonia. The winner is someone named Wally. Wally's idea for bringing fresh water to Elbonia is... "in a box." That's the best one? Boss: We only had one entry. CEO: I hate your bald guts. Wally: I get that a lot. If you need me, I'll be in my cubicle thinking up award-winning ideas.
Share June 11, 2014's comic on:
Dilbert: I read that winning at anything boosts your testosterone. Boss: I need one of you underlings to clean the mold out of the office fridge. That's your top priority today. Wally: What's this "winning" I keep hearing about?
Share January 11, 2015's comic on:
Wally: Asok, the key to winning at your job is the taper. Asok: Taper? Wally: At the start of any new job, you want to put in long hours and create a good first impression. Then you should start to gradually taper off your effort. But be sure you taper slowly. You don't want to be obvious. Boss: Wally, is it my imagination, or are you working slightly less every day? Wally: It only looks that way because I'm working smarter, not harder. Just the way you taught me. Boss: Okay, that sounds right. Wally: Always keep that round in the chamber. Asok: You scare me, but in a good way.
Share August 18, 2017's comic on:
Wally: Meetings used to be frustrating and boring until I gamified that situation. Now I try to win meetings by criticizing co-workers offering no ideas of my own, and leaving without any new task. Dilbert: You call that winning? Wally: Compared to my victims, yes.
Share June 11, 2018's comic on:
Asok: Can you mentor me on how to be successful? Wally: Your best strategy is a combination of lying and being related to rich people. Asok: What is the second-best strategy? Wally: Crime is second. Winning a lottery is third.
Share January 06, 2019's comic on:
Boss: I need to talk to you about your apple-eating. Dilbert: My what? Boss: Every afternoon you eat an apple at your desk. Your co-workers are complaining because it's loud. They can't work with all of your crispy chewing noise. Dilbert: In my defense, my co-workers are so incompetent that the less work they do, the better off the company is. Boss: That is a surprisingly robust defense. I'll come back if I can think of a counter-argument. Dilbert: Good luck. Crunch.
Share November 30, 2019's comic on:
dilbert: i did a regression analysis to find out which variables are common to all of our failures. wally: it's me isn't it? dilbert pointing to boss: no, it's him. wally: is this what winning feels like?
Share December 22, 2011's comic on:
Ratbert: I'm staging a peaceful protest against your greed and corruption. Dogbert: Do you have a permit to protest here? Ratbert: No. How much do they cost? I'm winning this, right?
Share April 28, 2012's comic on:
Carl: Im Wally's service monkey, I'll be fielding any questions directed at wally. The Boss: With all due respect, a business meeting is no place for a monkey. Carl: With all due respect, that was a stronger argument before I saw your powerpoint slides.
Share June 03, 1989's comic on:
Dilbert sits at the table reading the newspaper. Dogbert asks, "Which would you prefer: winning a million bucks or getting hit in the lips with a dead mole while you sleep?" Dilbert replies, "Uh . . . The money." Dogbert says, "Well, that's too bad, because you didn't win a million bucks." Dilbert turns toward the reader and says, "That's the kind of hypothetical question that can keep you up all night."