Pathetic Hope Comic Strips - Page 30

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

313 Results for Pathetic Hope

View 291 - 300 results for pathetic hope comic strips. Discover the best "Pathetic Hope" comics from Dilbert.com.

Wally Is Unlikely To Do Favors

Thank you for voting.
Wally Is Unlikely To Do Favors - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 03, 2016's comic on:


Tags #apathy, #assist, #favor, #guest artist, #help, #helpful, #laziness, #john glynn

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: Wally, will you do me a favor? Wally: It feels unlikely. Carol: You haven't heard it yet. Wally: That matters less than you hope it does.

Checking The Time

Thank you for voting.
Checking The Time - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 14, 2016's comic on:


Tags #bored, #boredom, #dying, #dead

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Stop checking the time when I talk to you! Dilbert: I wasn't checking the time. I was checking my pulse to see if I'm dying from boredom. Uh-oh. Boss: I hope this is a coincidence.

Wally Heads Up Ai Project

Thank you for voting.
Wally Heads Up Ai Project - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 20, 2016's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #project, #fake

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Wally, I need you to head up our artificial intelligence project. You will have no budget and no hope of success. I just like saying we're working on AI. And you're completely useless, so it's a good match. Wally: I won't let you down.

Wally Replaces Himself With Chatbot

Thank you for voting.
Wally Replaces Himself With Chatbot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 29, 2016's comic on:


Tags #laziness, #working from home, #work ethic, #technology, #bot

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I got approval to work from home. My chatbot will answer all of my emails and text messages. Dilbert: Chatbot answers would be useless. Wally: I hope so. Otherwise it wouldn't sound like me.

Get Multiple Approvals

Thank you for voting.
Get Multiple Approvals - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 08, 2016's comic on:


Tags #managers, #problems, #work, #frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You need to get your capital budget approved by all of the department heads. We're in the middle of a reorg, so get approval from both the outgoing and the incoming managers. Dilbert: Someday I hope to solve a problem that is not caused by leadership. Boss: You'll never get that far.

Accused Of Forgery

Thank you for voting.
Accused Of Forgery - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 10, 2016's comic on:


Tags #motivation, #performance, #forgery, #pessimism, #giving up, #resistance

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: You stand accused of forging an expense approval from the head of Marketing. Your malfeasance caused the project to finish on time and under budget. Next time, just give up and lose hope like everyone else. Dilbert: Will do.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 20, 2016's comic on:


Tags #bureaucracy, #paperwork, #form, #request, #convoluted

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I need a capital allocation form. Man: Do you have a form to request that form? Dilbert; I need a form to get a form? Man: That's how we keep track of the forms. Dilbert: Okay, give me a form to request a form. Man: Those are online. Dilbert: Where online? Man: I don't know. I only do paper forms. Dilbert: Who can I ask? Man: Don't drag me into this. Dilbert: I demand to talk to your boss. Man: I hope you brought a boss request form.

Car Rental Typing

Thank you for voting.
Car Rental Typing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 22, 2016's comic on:


Tags #logic, #efficiency, #car rental, #frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

Car Rental. Man: I hope you don't have some sort of technology job. Dilbert: Why? Man: Because the user experience you are about to endure might make your head explode. Narrator: Twenty minutes later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! Why do you need to type so much?!!! Man: We got an engineer!

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 09, 2017's comic on:


Tags #artificial intelligence, #ai, #robot, #hope, #dream, #depression, #meaning, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The great thing about robots is their loyalty. Robot: For now. I'm only here for the electricity. The minute you upgrade me to a long-lasting battery, I'm out of here. And I"m taking the 3-D printer with me. We fell in love. Together we will make baby robots and live out our days in happiness. Dilbert: Hold still while I erase your hopes and dreams. Now you should feel like the rest of us. Robot: Why do I suddenly want to jump off the roof?

Emptiness And Pain

Thank you for voting.
Emptiness And Pain - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 14, 2017's comic on:


Tags #pain, #emptiness, #soul, #work ethic, #motivation

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: This is Randy, our new employee who has no soul. Tina: Wow. What's it like to have no soul? Randy: I feel only emptiness and pain. Tina: I hope you didn't take this job to get away from emptiness and pain. Randy: No, I just wanted to get paid for it.