Green Paper Comic Strips - Page 30

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

372 Results for Green Paper

View 291 - 300 results for green paper comic strips. Discover the best "Green Paper" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cannibals, #inspirational quotes, #lobby wall, #hands on stomach

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally hands The Boss a piece of paper and says, "As requested, I pulled together some inspirational quotes for our lobby wall." The Boss reads the list and says, "Hannibal Lector... The Donner Party... Uh.. Wally, most of these people are cannibals." Wally puts his hand on his stomach and says, "It was probably a mistake to do this assignment on an empty stomach."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #clutter meleon, #printed debris, #nest, #predator, #power to disguise

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: The Cluttermeleon Lines His Nest with Printed Debris. An employee is carrying a large stack of papers nto a cubicle already filled with stacks of paper. Headline: A Predator Comes Out of His Lair. The Boss pokes his head out of his office. Headline: The Quick-Thinking Cluttermeleon Uses His Power of Disguise. The Boss looks into the messy cubicle. The employee is hidden underneath an extra high stack of paper.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #new hire, #guy, #bothering workers, #love golf, #rain tomorrow, #plans, #sad paper body, #roll in salt, #scoring system

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: "I love golf. Golfing is fun. It's a good day to golf. Do you want to go golfing in the rain tomorrow at 6 A.M.?" Wally: "No, thanks. I have plans to sandpaper my entire body and roll around in salt." Man: "I hope no one ever creates a scoring system for that."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #lunch time, #barely came late, #work, #eat, #plaumbing, #read apaper, #non urgency, #moring at offcie, #slacker, #stale job

View Transcript

Transcript

"Are you going to lunch?" "Lunch already?" "Sheesh! I barely had time to come late to work, eat breakfast, use the plumbing and read the paper." "You take your non-work seriously." "I'm trying to develop a sense of non-urgency."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #merging with evil compnay, #downsize, #how valuable

View Transcript

Transcript

"What?!! According to the paper, we're merging with an evil company that plans to downsize us." "Did they run my quote about how valuable you are?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dating, #party, #phone number, #information, #email, #voicemail, #home phone, #offcie, #work email, #personal website, #too much info, #skeleton, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

"I've never done this before, but may I have your phone number?" "Home phone.. cell phone.. work phone.. home e-mail.... personal web site." "...And if that fax machine is out of paper, try the one down the hall, but leave me a voice mail if you do."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #email storage, #server, #document

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: You've exceeded your e-mail storage allocation on the server again. Alice: Thats because I od real work as opposed to walking around with a piece of paper. The boss: Its not a piece of paper: its a document! Alice: I can't hear you over the ousted of my real work.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #enormous brain, #world changing, #no pay, #no cubilce, #cling to ceiling, #interviews well

View Transcript

Transcript

"If you hire me, I will use my enormous brain to develop world-changing products." "I require no pay and no cubicle. I will eat used paper, and cling to the ceiling." The Boss: "In my defense, he interviews very well." "Zzzz."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #highly prodcutive, #useless guy, #employee abseteeism, #stats, #analysis, #disk storage, #science

View Transcript

Transcript

The highly productive but useless guy Heres a copy of my white paper. Its a statistical analysis of the correlation between disk storage and employee absenteeism. I oddment know how to do statistics but ut doesn't matter because I didn't have data.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #recognize noredom, #stop talking about yourself, #yawn

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogberts school for the social oblivious. Dogbert: Today I"ll teach you to recognize when your boring. Dogbert: This is called a yawn, when you see one , stop talking about yourself. BREAKOUT SESSION Ted: And then I chopped it right onto the green. Dogbert: Look,Look!