Avoid Work Comic Strips - Page 30
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1000 Results for Avoid Work
View 291 - 300 results for avoid work comic strips. Discover the best "Avoid Work" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday March 11,
2017
Avoid Offending Sensitive Idiots
Tags politeness, etiquette, communication, sensitive, feelings, offense, political correctness, politically correct
Transcript
Dogbert: Avoid offending sensitive idiots whenever possible. Man: I'm a sensitive idiot and I find that offensive. Dogbert: It's okay in your case because you had it coming. Man: Good point. Carry on.
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Thursday March 09,
2017
No Texting At Work
Tags politeness, etiquette, company policy, communication, distraction, social media, conversation, interaction, technology
Transcript
Dilbert: The company's new politeness policy forbids you from texting while I am trying to talk to you. Alice: I'm not using a texting app. I'm replying to people on social media. Dilbert: You're missing the point. Alice: When did my happiness stop being the point?
Sunday March 05,
2017
Tags time, delay, leaving, schedule, inconsiderate
Transcript
Woman: Can you take a look at the prototype? It keeps crashing. Dilbert: I was just leaving for the day. Woman: It will only take ten minutes. Dilbert: I came to work early so I could leave early and beat the traffic. Woman: No problem. It will only take ten minutes. Dilbert: It's never ten minutes! People always say it will be ten minutes, but it's never ten minutes! I give up! Where is it? Woman: Find it in the lab. I need to leave early to beat the traffic.
Monday February 27,
2017
Wally's Political Views
Tags disagreement, Politics, Opinion, differences, arguing
Transcript
Tina: I can't work with Wally. His political views are abhorrent. Boss: That has nothing to do with your job. Tina: He makes me too sad and angry to work! Boss: Would you be happy if I punished him for having an opinion? Tina: Would I be a bad person if I said I would?
Saturday February 25,
2017
Wally Is Born For The Job
Friday February 24,
2017
Taking Pride In Work
Tags motivation, pep talk, logic, pride, suffering, work ethic
Transcript
Boss: Wally, I"m starting to think you don't take pride in your work. Wally: That would be like taking pride in being the victim of a crime. Catbert: How'd the pep talk go? Boss: He made some good points.
Thursday February 23,
2017
Alice And The Legacy System
Tags dedication, work ethic, boredom, overwork, time
Transcript
Alice: Does it bother you to work on the old legacy system when the rest of us are doing exciting new things? Wally: I leave work at 4 p.m. every day. Wally: How about you? Alice: Squatters keep moving into my house.
Monday February 20,
2017
Who Wants The Legacy System Job
Tags laziness, work ethic, legacy, underachiever, volunteer
Transcript
Boss: I'm assigning our best and brightest engineers to the new system integration team. Anyone who is left over gets to be in charge of watching our legacy system slowly rot. Dilbert: Who would want that job? Wally: Me!!! Pick me!!!
Tuesday February 14,
2017
Looks Good But Won't Work
Tags ideas, impracticality, managers, leadership, threat
Transcript
Boss: The one they call Dilbert suggested we do something that looks good but won't work. CEO: Is this the first trace of management potential you've seen from him? Boss: You think it's a fluke? CEO: Let's keep an eye on it.
Monday February 13,
2017
Bad Optics
Tags appearances, optics, logic, deception
Transcript
Boss: I don't like the optics of your plan. Dilbert: It's the only plan that can work. Should I change it to something that looks good but won't work? Boss: Excellent idea. You might have more management potential than I though.

