Ted Comic Strips - Page 30
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Character
448 Results for Ted
View 291 - 300 results for ted comic strips. Discover the best "Ted" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday August 02,
2000
Tags promotion in title, senior vice duke, imperial majesty, engineering, business cards, vice duke
Transcript
The Boss says to Ted, "Ted, I'm giving you a promotion in title." Ted replies, "Wow!" The Boss continues, "Now you're the Senior Vice Duke and Imperial Majesty of all engineering." Ted turns and asks the Boss, "Can I have business cards now?" The Boss answers, "No, you're only a Vice Duke."
Tuesday July 25,
2000
Tags didn't ask, erased hard drive, mansplain, reformatting hard drive, step aside, upgardes
Transcript
Ted says to Noriko, "Step aside. I'm from I.S." Noriko replies, "I didn't ask for any upgrades. " Ted answers, "That's what they all say until..." Noriko says to Ted in a horrified voice, "It's reformatting my hard drive!" Ted replies, "That's ten in a row. Maybe it's me."
Tuesday July 18,
2000
Tags staff cuts, target t shirt, special target
Transcript
The Boss says to his staff during a meeting, "This special T-shirt is awarded to Ted for all of his achievements." The Boss continues, "Next on the agenda..." Ted attempts to put on the T-shirt which has a bullseye on the front. The Boss says to the group, "We're planning some staff cuts."
Sunday July 02,
2000
Tags system failures, data aren't actionable, no practical value, crime, guilty, feel awkward, incident
Transcript
Ted says to Dilbert and Wally, "We had fifteen system failures with the previous software." Dilbert says to Ted, "Your data aren't actionable." Ted replies, "What?" Dilbert continues, "Your presentation has no practical walue." Ted throws his hands in the air in defeat and says to Dilbert, "Well, if that's suddenly a crime then call me guilty!" Wally says, "Now the meeting feels awkward can we go back to acting interested?" Dilbert replies, "I guess." Ted says, "Fine. Let's put this ugly incident behind us."
Saturday June 17,
2000
Tags meeting, strange words, make sense, pow, buy card, business
Transcript
Ted says to Dilbert and Wally, "Uh-oh...suddenly this meeting and all the strange words make sense." Wally's head explodes. Wally says to Dilbert, "It's your turn to buy the card."
Friday May 26,
2000
Tags firing ted, organize goodbye party, suprise, what happens
Transcript
Carol comes into the Boss' office and says, "At ten you'll be firing Ted. I'll organize his goodbye party." The Boss says, "You know what would be more efficient?" Dilbert, Carol, Wally and Asok the Intern stand in a room wearing party hats. Dilbert asks, "What happens after we yell 'Surprise'?"
Sunday April 09,
2000
Tags fly to austin, customer, call big cutsomers, go inperson, telephone, show you care, concept of phone
Transcript
Dilbert sits at the Boss' desk in his office and the Boss says to him, "Fly to Austin and answer some questions for a big customer." Dilbert asks, "Doesn't this customer have a telephone?" The Boss replies in shock as he thrusts his arms out to the side. "You don't call big customers!" Obviously confused, Dilbert aks "Um...why not?" In an exasperated voice, The Boss replies "You have to go in person to show that you care." Still not catching on, Dilbert replies "Actually, that would show that I didn't understand the concept of the telephone.? Now completely disgusted, The Boss replies "Just go." Dilbert is now sitting at a table with Ted who holds a phone in his hand and asks, "Do they have these where you come from?"
Sunday April 02,
2000
Tags sing or dance, resigned, huge resignation, manifesto, video clips, humorous sound files, website, broadway theater prodcution, first motivated employee, technology
Transcript
Ted approaches Dilbert, "Can you sing or dance?" Dilbert turns to face Ted, "Ted? I thought you resigned in disgust two weeks ago." Ted replies, "Well...I wrote a huge resignation manifesto that I planned to e-mail to the entire company." With hands raised Ted says, "But I thought it needed pictures." With arms now raised to the side Ted says, "Before long I was adding video clips and humorous sound files." Exasperated Ted states, "Then I thought, hey, why not put it all on a website?" More calmed and reserved, Ted says "Now I'm turning the whole thing into an off Broadway theatre production." Arriving home after work, Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I saw my first motivated employee today."
Thursday March 02,
2000
Tags files, hid files, skeleton, babe, home wrecker
Transcript
Asok peers into a closet with lots of janitorial supplies and in the middle of which is a tall stack of files. He thinks: "I have found where Ted hid his files before he quit." Inside the closet he also finds a skeleton. He thinks: "A skeleton! I know what I must do." Asok is in his cubicle. He has placed the skeleton, who is now wearing the threads of a mop as a hairpeice, in a chair next to him. Asok is busy with his computer. Wally asks Asok: "Who's the babe?" Asok warns Wally: "Stay away homewrecker."
Wednesday March 01,
2000
Tags where he hid files, disgruntled, porcelain patty, job resigned
Transcript
Asok the Intern is at the Boss's office. The Boss is sitting behind his desk. He tells Asok: "Ted resigned. Your job is to find out where he hid his files." He continues: "Our only clue is that he was disgruntled." Asok is in the bathroom. He jots down in his notepad: "Negatory on porcelain patty."

