Mom Called Comic Strips - Page 30

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

306 Results for Mom Called

View 291 - 300 results for mom called comic strips. Discover the best "Mom Called" comics from Dilbert.com.

We're Not A Bunch Of Idiots

Thank you for voting.
We're Not A Bunch Of Idiots - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 19, 2018's comic on:

Tags #marketing, #damage control, #slogan, #tag line, #image, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: A feature article in the business press called our leadership a "bunch of morons." Boss: To counter that slanderous story, our new market slogan is "We're Not A Bunch Of Morons!" CEO: Problem solved. Boss: It was deceptively easy.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 15, 2018's comic on:

Tags #suggestion, #invention, #budget, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The electronic suggestion box project is halfway done. The original design called for a bos that scans and digitizes suggestions written on paper and emails them to the appropriate manager. Then the device shreds the original paper suggestion to make room for more. I already built the box and the shredder. I'll need additional funding to finish the scanning part. Boss: We don't have any flexibility in our budget. Let's just deploy what you have. Dilbert: All I have is a box that shreds suggestions before anyone reads them. Boss: Don't let perfect be the enemy of good.

Bad Data

Thank you for voting.
Bad Data - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 03, 2018's comic on:

Tags #data, #information, #accuracy

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: What does the data tell us to do? Dilbert: We only have bad data on this. Boss: Does the bad data suggest we should do what we wanted to do anyway? Dilbert: Well, yes. Boss: That's called "good data."

Our Api

Thank you for voting.
Our Api - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 09, 2018's comic on:

Tags #hackers, #hacking, #api, #jargon, #obliviousness, #language

View Transcript

Transcript

Narrator: Dogbert The Reporter. Dogbert: How did hackers get access to your customer data? CEO: I'm told they used something called "our A.P.I." to suck out all the data. Dogbert: I'll just say you'er stupid. CEO: Why does everyone always say that?

Elbonians Call Off The Hit

Thank you for voting.
Elbonians Call Off The Hit - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 20, 2018's comic on:

Tags #cruelty, #hit man, #murder, #torture

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Elbonia called off its plan to kill you for your culturally offensive sales video. They decided it was more cruel to keep you alive and working here. Dilbert: They're monsters! Boss: Get back in your cubicle.

Dilbert Characters

Radical Candor

Thank you for voting.
Radical Candor - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 04, 2018's comic on:

Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #management, #radical condor, #time, #computer

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: I've decided to adopt a hot new management trend called, "Radical Condor." The trick is to be direct yet kind at the same time. Dilbert: What were you doing before? The Boss: Let's not get into that.

No Policy Against Lying

Thank you for voting.
No Policy Against Lying - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 26, 2018's comic on:

Tags #Catbert, #ted, #evil, #director, #human, #resources, #lying, #policy, #checked

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Evil director of human resources. Ted: Alice called me a liar. Catbert: What were you doing when that happened? Ted: Lying. Catbert: Maybe we should talk about that. Ted: There's no company policy against lying I checked.

Ted The Liar

Thank you for voting.
Ted The Liar - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 27, 2018's comic on:

Tags #alice, #the boss, #ted, #liar, #policy, #forbid, #disrespecting, #co-workers, #lying

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Ted says you called him a liar. Our policy forbids disrespecting your co-workers. Alice: But Ted's lying is okay? The Boss: We don't have a policy about lying. Alice: Did Ted tell you that? The Boss: Yes. Oh...

Making Your Boss Look Good

Thank you for voting.
Making Your Boss Look Good - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 08, 2018's comic on:

Tags #boss, #criticism, #ego, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #responsibility

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You did this wrong. Dilbert: That's how you trained me to do it. Bob: You need to learn to take responsibility for my mistakes. It's called "making your boss look good". Dilbert: Maybe you could help a little too.

New Year's Day

Thank you for voting.
New Year's Day - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 01, 2019's comic on:

Tags #holidays, #new year's day, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Happy random calendar date. I'll be celebrating by doing nothing fun or useful all day because everything is closed. Dogbert: You could visit your mom. Dilbert: How's that different from what I just said?