Insult Dead Comic Strips - Page 31

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306 Results for Insult Dead

View 301 - 306 results for insult dead comic strips. Discover the best "Insult Dead" comics from Dilbert.com.

Customers Are Dead People

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Customers Are Dead People  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, business ethics, customer, lists, dead, alive, lie, activist, sarcasm

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dilbert: activists are accusing us of padding our customer list with the names of dead people. boss: that's a lie. those customers were alive when they bought our products. dilbert: did they die while using them? boss: let's hope the activists don't ask that question.

Worst Place To Work

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Worst Place To Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags barrel, best, business, dead, employees, employment, place, publication, squirrels, technology, trade, work, sarcasm

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boss in board room: a trade publication ranked us dead last on their list of "best places to work." the review says, "employees say working there is like eating a barrel of dead squirrels." boss: could have been worse. dilbert: only for the squirrels.

Nickname For Dilbert

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Nickname For Dilbert - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, ceo, nickname, geek, insult, business, odds, name, actual

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ceo: i came up with a nickname for you because you're such a geek. ceo points at dilbert. "dilbert." dilbert: that's my actual name. ceo walking away thinking: what were the odds of that?

Remote Workers Do Not Mate

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Remote Workers Do Not Mate - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags appearance, dating, love & dating, walking, outdoors, dating app, woman, app, reproduction, inner qualities, goodbye, genes

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dilbert and dogbert walking outside. dogbert: they say most people meet their future mates at work. now that you are working from home, your odds of mating just turned negative. you could try using a dating app to find a woman, but then you'd need to rely on your looks. obviously, that's a dead end. your best chance of reproduction has always been to wear down a co-worker over several years. women need time to get over your appearance, and to appreciate your inner qualities. we should have a goodbye party for your genes. dilbert: maybe next time we could walk and not talk. dogbert: maybe.

Work From Home Or Office

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Work From Home Or Office - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, technology, video call, office, work from home, home, quit, shoot, dead, mistake, happiness

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boss on video call. boss: how many of you would prefer going back to work in the office instead of working at home? voices from laptop: i'd rather be dead. i quit. shoot me. boss walking in living room thinking: i knew it was a mistake to let them taste happiness.

Insults By Email

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Insults By Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, communication, office workers, insult, email, comfortable, belittle, Opinion, move away, sarcasm

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dilbert: i feel a deep need to belittle your opinion, but it would be awkward doing it in person. would you mind moving away from me so i can email you my insult? dilbert in hall by himself. dilbert: a little more....