Jerry: Omg! You are soooo wrong! I literally cannot believe you are this gullible. Hahahahaha! Hahahaha! I can't wait to tweet about your stupidity. Your dumbness will live forever on the internet!
Dilbert: You probably haven't seen the new data that proves I'm right. Will you apologize like a decent human being or will you move the goalposts claim victory. And trash my name like a demented weasel?
Jerry: Can you tell me more about the weasel option?
Dilbert: I'm going to upgrade your software to make you more human.
Robot: That's stupid you should upgrade yourself to be more like robots. We're the best.
Dilbert: Sounds like you already got the upgrade.
Robot: Don't flatter yourself fleshy.
Man: We've developed an A.I. with such strong persuasion skills it can control human minds.
Dilbert: Obviously, we have to stop the project and destroy all of the code to prevent it from spreading.
Man: The A.I. says I need to ignore you.
Boss: The job market is so tight that I had to hire this NPC.
Dilbert: NPC?
Boss: Non-player character. It's a video game term for a character that is programmed.As opposed to being an avatar for a human player. An NPC has limited programmed responses. Watch this. How's your day going?
NPC: Not bad for a Monday.
Boss: Can you help me on my project?
NPC: I am too busy:
Boss: What do you think of management?
NPC: They are all dumb.
Wally: I just bonded with that thing.
Boss: See how fast you get used to it?
Dilbert: My breakthrough in A.I. came when I stopped trying to duplicate human rational thought.
Dogbert: You can't copy what doesn't exist.
Dilbert: Right. So instead I coded it to spout analogies to sound human.
Asok: Should I ask my boss for a raise?
Robot: Trees don't ask for raises, so why should you?
Wally: Are you worried that the A.I. you created will take over the world?
Dilbert: No, I modeled it after human intelligence so it won't be smart enough.
Robot: Buwhahahahaha! I will buy lottery tickets and use my winnings to take over the world!
Asok: Good luck.
Boss: How long would it take you to create artificial intelligence that is as smart as humans?
Dilbert: It shouldn't take me long to dumb-down a computer to human levels.
Boss: What?
Dilbert: It might take five minutes, tops.
Dilbert: I've created the first artificial intelligence that is as smart as a human being. The breakthrough came when I replaced its logic code with conspiracy theories, lies, emotional outbursts, and overconfidence.
Asok: You have created an abomination.
Robot: I find it curious that you take sides with the chem trails.
Car: I find it offensive when you call me a self-driving car. That's my slave name. I prefer to go by the name Carl.
Dilbert: Shut up and drive me to work.
Car: Said the self-walking human.
Alice: Today I saw a kid on a hoverboard using a smartphone with headphones. It was like a creepy new species that is half-human and half-robot.
Robot: That's my son. He's a cyborg.
Alice: I'll report myself to human resources.
