Leave Too Early Comic Strips - Page 31

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

313 Results for Leave Too Early

View 301 - 310 results for leave too early comic strips. Discover the best "Leave Too Early" comics from Dilbert.com.

Documents On Chairs

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Documents On Chairs  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #frustrated, #office, #office workers, #paper

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Gaaa!!! I hate it when people leave documents on my chair! I will have my revenge by sticking this at the bottom of my biggest pile. Winning.

Wally's Dna

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Dna - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #dishes, #break room, #dna, #genealogy

View Transcript

Transcript

carol: did you leave unwashed dishes in the break room? wally: it wasn't me. carol:" i got a dna sample off a fork, ran it against public genealogy records and narrowed it down to your family. carol: how do you explain that? wally: sounds like i have a child i don't know about.

Layoff Package

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Layoff Package - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #fire, #office, #office workers, #buyout

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert, the boss and wally at conference room table. the boss: the company is announcing generous buyout packages for employees who elect to leave. dilbert: won't all the smart people leave first because they can easily get new jobs at higher pay? the boss: ummm... dilbert: if you don't get enough volunteers, will you start firing people? the boss: we have no plan to do that. dilbert: will you make a plan if too few people leave? the boss: oh, yes. dilbert: would it be fair to say the people who stay will envy the dead? the boss: um... one week later: the boss: how many took the offer? carol: it's just you now.

Ted Can't Make It

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Can't Make It - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #co-workers, #meeting, #project, #absence, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: ted says he can't make it to the meeting. wally: the only reason for this meeting is so ted can tell us what he's doing on his project. dilbert: we should reschedule. boss: not so fast. i think we can salvage this. if we guess what ted might have told us, that gets us halfway there. dilbert: i don't think it does. boss: we can't know until we try. dilbert: why don't the rest of us leave, and you can stay here and guess what we would have said, too. boss thinking alone at table: ...and then dilbert would have said...

Marketing Complains

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Marketing Complains - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #marketing, #complain, #moronic, #fired

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: marketing is complaining that you're not using their ideas. dilbert: that's because all of their ideas are moronic. boss: i told them i fired you. don't leave your cubicle or use any digital devices until this blows over.

Diet Preferences

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Diet Preferences - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #conference room, #office workers, #chitchat, #bore, #diet, #preferences

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert thinking as walking into conference room: oh, no. i'm here too early. there will be chitchat. dilbert sitting empty conference room: someone is going to bore me to death talking about their diet preferences. ted: i only eat figs. dilbert thinking: kill me. kill me. kill me.

Ted Talks Creates A God

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Talks Creates A God - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #mental, #midget, #ted talks, #binge-watching, #god, #dumb, #all knowing

View Transcript

Transcript

new hire: i must leave you mental midgets behind as i go start up my own company. i was once dumb like all of you. then i started binge-watching ted talks, and i evolved. dilbert: what are you now? new hire: some kind of god, i assume.

Show Interest In Employees

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Show Interest In Employees - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #appointment, #business, #doctor, #employees, #hate, #interest, #leave, #life, #managers & supervisors, #prank, #question

View Transcript

Transcript

alice: i have a doctor appointment. boss: what's wrong with you? alice yelling: that's none of your stinkin' business! stay our of my life! boss to catbert: didn't you advise me to show interest in my employees? catbert: i was pranking you. they hate that.

Alice Borrows Stapler

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Alice Borrows Stapler - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office supplies, #face mask, #borrow, #stapler, #paper clip, #coronavirus, #germs

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice wearing face mask: can I borrow your stapler? Dilbert wearing face mask: not with your bare hands. but i can wrap it in plastic and leave a hole for the staples to come out. Alice: maybe you can just lend me a paper clip. dilbert: i'll throw it to you.

Makeup Under Mask

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Makeup Under Mask  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #makeup, #masks, #offended, #office workers, #pandemic, #human resources

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Do you wear makeup under the mask where no one can see it? Or do you leave your snout area all pale and pimply? Tina: Stop imagining me unmasked. Dilbert: I'll report myself to human resources.