Managers & Supervisors Comic Strips - Page 31

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469 Results for Managers & Supervisors

View 301 - 310 results for managers & supervisors comic strips. Discover the best "Managers & Supervisors" comics from Dilbert.com.

Loving Yourself

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Loving Yourself  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, office workers, philosophy, self love, evil, ignorant, selfish, lazy, love

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boss: philosophers say loving yourself is the greatest love of all. carol: do philosophers really say that? boss: all the good ones do. after years of trying, i have finally learned to love myself. carol: i'm no philosopher, but instead of learning to love yourself the way you are... wouldn't it be better if you learned how to stop being an evil, ignorant, selfish piece of garbage. boss: that sounds a lot harder. carol: in other words, you are lazy. boss: i love that about me!

Impostor Syndrome

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Impostor Syndrome  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, sarcasm, business, imposter, syndrome, manager, acting, pretend

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boss: i have a bad case of imposter syndrome. i feel as if i'm only pretending to be a good manager, and someday everyone will find out it's an act. dilbert: if it makes you feel any better, we figured that out a while ago.

Wally Prefers Systems

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Wally Prefers Systems  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, business, office workers, goals, question, answer, system, year

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dilbert: what are your goals for the year? wally: i prefer systems over goals. dilbert: okay, what are your systems? wally: none of them involve answering questions.

Compilation Video

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Compilation Video  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, useful, video, co-workers, incompetent, comparision, meeting, compile

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wally: you think i didn't do anything useful this year. so i made a compilation video of my co-workers being incompetent in meetings for comparison. boss: at least they are trying. wally: as you can see, maybe they shouldn't.

Dogbert In The Cloud

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Dogbert In The Cloud   - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, personal, information, cloud, safe, worry, trust, manage, system, browser, history

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boss: i'm concerned that storing my personal information in the cloud is not safe. dilbert: don't be such a worrier. i'm sure we can trust the people who manage those systems to keep us safe. somewhere in the cloud dogbert: hee-hee! look at the browser history on this bunion-having loser.

Hiring Morons

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Hiring Morons - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, technology, business, technical, job, market, hire, moron, critical

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boss: the job market is so hot right now that we can only afford to hire morons. dilbert: how will we fill our critical technical jobs? boss: i just told you.

Hiring Morons And Ted

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Hiring Morons And Ted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, labor, market, hire, moron, position, ted talk, video, smart

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boss: the labor market is so tight that i had to hire a moron just to fill a position. my plan is to make him watch ted talk videos until he smartens up. dilbert: how many will it take? boss: with any luck, fifteen to seventeen will get it done.

Ted Talks Might Take Your Job

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Ted Talks Might Take Your Job - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, social media, technology, instagram, ted talks, smart, moron

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boss: the moron i hired keeps watching ted talks and getting smarter. he's only about three ted talks away from taking your job. ceo: there must be a way to slow him down. boss: i'll see if i can interest him in instagram.

Elbonian Factory Problem

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Elbonian Factory Problem - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, report, factory, elbonia, problem, lost, power, main, floor, employees, scared, trip, dark, gas, line, accident, crater, capital, explosion, unsympathetic

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dilbert: we have some problems in our elbonian factory. boss: how bad? dilbert: they lost power on the main floor. boss: that's not so bad. dilbert: the employees were scared. boss: they'll get over it. dilbert: one of them tripped in the dark. boss: big deal. dilbert: he accidentally opened a gas line. boss: a little gas never hurt anyone. dilbert: now there's a crater where the capital city used to be. boss and dilbert just looking at each other boss: let's keep an eye on that.

I Will Send You A List

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I Will Send You A List - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, technology, target, complicated, detail, list

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wally: and i plan to meet my targets by doing a variety of complicated things. boss: what kind of things? wally: i'll send you a detailed list. boss: what if you forget to send it? wally: with any luck, you'll forget you asked for it.