Dogbert Comic Strips - Page 32

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View 311 - 320 results for dogbert comic strips. Discover the best "Dogbert" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags note, Dilbert, potato, glasses, eyes, contact, lenses, reference, Dogbert, lady di, witch, witch's curse

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The panel says, "Note: Some new readers of this strip may be confused by the presence of a character who looks very much like a potato. The following comparison should clear things up:" A caption pointing to a drawing of Dilbert the Frog says, "Dilbert (turned into a frog and disguised as Prince Charles)." A caption points to a potato. The panel says, "A handy rule for telling which one is a potato is to look for the presence of glasses. Although potatoes do have eyes, they are know to be vain and generally prefer contact lenses. Keep this reference guide with you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, Dilbert, infiltrated, buckingham palace, princess, frog curse, disguise, Charlie, breath, smell, flies, lady di, common person

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Dogbert looks at a clock on the wall and thinks, "By now Dilbert should have infiltrated Buckingham Palace." Dogbert thinks, "One kiss from the Princess and his 'frog curse' will be lifted . . . I just hope his disguise works . . ." Inside a tower, Lady Diana asks, "Charlie, why does your breath smell like flies?" Dilbert the Frog answers, "Uh . . . I had lunch with a common person today . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, woman, monogamy, field, shuttle, Dogbert, rides, uno, love, Advice

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I'm just a one-woman kind of guy." Dilbert continues, "Some guys like to play the field. Not me. I'm happy with just one woman." Dilbert continues, "Just one. Uno. That's best for me." Dogbert says, "You can take her for rides in the Space Shuttle you'll never have either."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, Dilbert, valuable, collect, good ones, stamps, fulfilling, adrenalin rush

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Dilbert sits at a table and looks at a stamp through a magnifying glass. Dogbert asks, "Why do people collect stamps?" Dilbert replies, "Because they're valuable." Dogbert asks, "Why are they valuable?" Dilbert replies, "Because people collect up all the good ones." Dogbert says, "So, you collect stamps because they're valuable, and they're valuable because you collect them." Dilbert replies, "Right." Dogbert says, "Sounds pretty fulfilling." Dilbert replies, "To be honest, I just do it for the adrenalin rush."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, personality, cult, wear, bathrobes, picture, back, run, naked, attractive, people

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Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "I'm going to form a personality cult to honor me." Dogbert continues, "I'll take everybody's money and make them wear bathrobes with my picture on the back." Dilbert asks, "Wouldn't it be cheaper to brand them and let them run naked?" Dogbert replies, "As a rule, we're not talking about attractive people here."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, cult, several, spiritual, leaders, already, demonstrates, complete, absence, indpendent, chant

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A woman sits on the floor across from Dogbert's desk. The woman says, "I'm hoping you will accept me in the Dogbert Cult." Dogbert says, "You do have a strong resume . . ." Dogbert continues, "Looks like you've been fleeced by several spiritual leaders already." The woman says, "I think that demonstrates a complete absence of independent thought." Dogbert asks, "Can you chant?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dinosaurs, Dilbert, cult, enforcers, hideous, cynical, nature, organization, part

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Bob and Dawn the Dinosaurs sit on the floor across from Dogbert. Bob says, "We heard you're forming a cult. Can we join?" Dogbert says, "Hmm . . ." Dogbert replies, "Yeah . . . I could use some enforcers to help me conceal the hideous and cynical nature of my organization. You're in . . ." Bob raises his arms over his head and yells, "Yes! We made it!" Dawn asks, "Bob, should we ask about the hideous part?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bob, dawn, dogberts, security, neutralize, motives, accident, dinosaurs, cult

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The caption says, "Bob and Dawn join Dogbert's cult." Dogbert says to Bob and Dawn the Dinosaurs, "You two are in charge of security." Dogbert continues, "Your job is to neutralize anybody who questions my motives." Dawn says, "Actually, we have some questions of our own . . ." Dawn asks, "Or should we just neutralize ourselves?" Dogbert replies, "Make it look like an accident."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, dawn, bob, dinosaurs, cult, trucks, questioning

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Dilbert sits at his desk. Dawn and Bob the Dinosaurs asks, "Uh . . . Dilbert, could we get your advice?" Bob says, "We just joined Dogbert's new cult." Dawn says, "And he ordered us to kill each other for questioning him." Dilbert says, "Hmm . . . Maybe you could just shove each other in front of trucks."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, suggestion, boss, boost, productivity, limited, trial, died

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Dilbert stands across from the Boss's desk. The Boss tells Dilbert, "This is a very interesting employee suggestion." Dilbert replies, "Thank you, sir." The Boss says, "If I read this correctly . . ." The Boss continues, "You observed that everybody is smarter than his boss . . ." Dilbert says, "Exactly . . . So we all just switch jobs with our bosses and boost productivity by 200 percent!!" The Boss says, "I've decided to do a limited trial . . ." A janitor enters the room and tells Dilbert, "Something died in the stairwell. Take care of it."