Product Comic Strips - Page 32

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

385 Results for Product

View 311 - 320 results for product comic strips. Discover the best "Product" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dogbert The Product Designer

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert The Product Designer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags design, form, function, product design, product designer, selfishness, portfolio

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the Product Designer. Dogbert: You might think my job is to make products that are easy to use. But that wouldn't help me, so instead I design stuff that looks good in my portfolio but is impossible to use. Dilbert: This looks great, but no one will be able to see black buttons on a black case. Dogbert: Not my problem.

Dogbert Makes A Product That Begs For Updates

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert Makes A Product That Begs For Updates - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags product design, product designer, cruelty, update, computer, reboot, operating system, torture, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert The Product Designer. Dogbert: I created an operating system that uses up 80% of your time begging for updates. That still leaves a healthy 20% of your time to... reboot your computer over and over. Boss: Can it fax?

Brainstorm With Other Engineers

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Brainstorm With Other Engineers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags product design, managers, marketing, simplicity, complication, inventions, ideas, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our marketing people tell me your double-handed coffee mug could be a huge seller. Brainstorm with the other engineers and see if it needs more features. Wally: Do you have any other ideas for ruining the product, or should I focus on that one?

Dilbert And Alice Add Features

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert And Alice Add Features - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags inventions, simplicity, engineers, complication, complicated, coffee, mug, overthinking

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Our boss asked me to totally ruin my double-handled coffee mug invention by adding features. I am asking each of you to suppress your engineering impulses just this one time and let this perfect product stay perfect. Dilbert: It would be perfect if it had wi-fi and a projection keyboard. Alice: Maybe add some health sensors and GPS.

Agreeing Like Disagreeing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Agreeing Like Disagreeing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags criticism, respect, disrespect, Opinion, arguing, argument

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Experts say I should show respect for your opinion before voicing disagreement. So I respect your decision to release our product without user interface testing. Boss: Your respect sounds exactly like disrespect. Dilbert: How is that my fault?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags public speaking, presentation, question, questions, stupid, idiot, idiots, criticism, critic

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need you to critique my presentation for the board. And don't hold back to spare my feelings. Dilbert: That probably won't be an issue. Alice: We got this. Boss: My product idea has three components. Alice: How do you know another company isn't secretly preparing to launch the same product? Boss: What kind of stupid question is that? Alice: It's the same question you asked me yesterday about my product idea. Boss: The board won't ask that. Alice: Don't be so sure. I hear they're idiots.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags tagline, marketing, advertising, ad, ads, impossible, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We need a tagline for our new product. It should be no more than three words. It should convey an emotion. And it should clearly explain everything the product does. Dilbert: In three words? Boss :I didn't say it would be easy. Nike accomplished all of that with "Just do it." Dilbert: Did they? Because that seems like a generic thing you can say in any situation. Boss: Just do it! Alice: How about "Keep doing it?" Is that one taken?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags idea, brainstorm, bald, baldness, hat, steal, patent, invention

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I thought of a product idea that could solve the baldness epidemic. Imagine an opaque material in the shape of a dome that puts the top of one's head in stealth mode. Dilbert: We could call it a "hat." CEO: Stop trying to steal my idea!

The Cause Of Human Motivation

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
The Cause Of Human Motivation - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags motivation, cause and effect, trick, deception, logic, laziness, work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Do you believe human motivation is the product of a person's genes or the environment? Boss: Both. Duh. Anyway, I asked you here to discuss your terrible job performance. Wally: We just did. You said it isn't my fault.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags modernity, reality, thinking, frustration, panic, existentialism, existence, meaning of life

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Looks like another day of flailing toward arbitrary goals. I will battle my way through a sea of idiots, much like the zombie apocalypse. My ego will be tested and my nervous system will be degraded. And all of this is to earn money so I can... buy items that scientists and product designers have brainwashed me to crave. But I get back at them by writing software they think they can't live without. My life is like two piles of meat trying to play ping pong. Alice: Stop mumbling and take care of this. Dilbert: You take care of it.