Coffee Shop Comic Strips - Page 32
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Character
365 Results for Coffee Shop
View 311 - 320 results for coffee shop comic strips. Discover the best "Coffee Shop" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday May 24,
2014
Tags customer survey, flying car, idiots, new software, people who buy, survey, cafe, coffee cup
Transcript
Dilbert: I have the results of our customer survey. The new software feature they want most is "Flying car" Boss: Did you survey any people who aren't idiots? Dilbert: No, I only surveyed people who buy from us.
Friday June 27,
2014
Tags laziness, work ethic, slacker, entire career, listen to podcasts, drink coffe, surf internet, multi slacking
Transcript
Wally: I've been a slacker my entire career, but now I want more out of life. My plan is to listen to podcasts while I drink coffee and search the Internet for fun. Dilbert: Multi-slacking? Wally: Wish me luck.
Saturday December 20,
2014
Tina Spreads Rumors About Dilbert
Tags rumor mill, rumors, freak accident, naked, vacuuming, spread rumors, coffee machine, gossip, office, self preservation
Transcript
Tina: I heard you had a freak accident while vacuuming your house naked. Dilbert: That's a rumor. I don't know how that stuff spreads. Tina: Now I feel a little bad that I told thirty people.
Wednesday December 24,
2014
Sounded Interesting From Across The Room
Tags conversation, smartphone technology, speed evolve, meta organism, sum of parts, looked interetsing, employees, coffee break, cups, business
Transcript
Tina: What are you talking about? It sounds interesting. Dilbert: We were saying that our smartphone technology has caused us to speed-evolve into a meta-organism that is the sum of our connected parts. Tina: In my defense, from across the room it looked interesting.
Wednesday April 15,
2015
Wally Is Employee Of The Year
Tags awards, cheating, deception, patent, catch-22, work ethic, laziness
Transcript
CEO: Our Employee Of The Year is Wally, for filing the most patents of any engineer in our history. Dilbert: How many have been granted? CEO: Well, most of them... I assume? Wally: How much coffee does this thing hold?
Thursday April 16,
2015
Wally Uses Tropy For Credibility
Tags trophy, labels, credibility, employee of the year, awards, award, deception
Transcript
Wall: I use my "Employee of the Year" trophy for my coffee now because it gives me instant credibility. Dilbert: I don't see how. Wally: People are not deep. Man: That's the dumbest thing anyone's ever... oh, sorry. Didn't see your trophy.
Monday April 20,
2015
Brainstorm With Other Engineers
Tags product design, managers, marketing, simplicity, complication, inventions, ideas, business
Transcript
Boss: Our marketing people tell me your double-handed coffee mug could be a huge seller. Brainstorm with the other engineers and see if it needs more features. Wally: Do you have any other ideas for ruining the product, or should I focus on that one?
Wednesday April 22,
2015
Wally Not A Fan Of Implementation
Tags invention, inventions, design, complication, overthinking
Transcript
Wally: I asked the other engineers to help me develop my double-handed coffee mug invention. Now it is bloated with useless features and not dishwasher safe. Maybe you should cancel the project. Boss: Are you okay with that? Wally: I've never been a big fan of the implementation phase.
Sunday July 26,
2015
Tags meeting, first impression, culture, interview, job interview, deception, revenge, nice, niceness, nice people, business
Transcript
Job Interview. Boss; When I make hiring decisions, my biggest priority is cultural fit. Man: Your buzzwords are like music to my unemployed ears. And here come some employees who can tell me about your company culture. Boss: Uh-oh. Man: Hey, guys. Can I ask some questions about the culture here? Dilbert: Working here is like a paradise. Wally: Best place ever. Dilbert: Our days are full of laughter, hugging, and camaraderie. Wally: Coffee is free! Man: Wow. Thanks. I look forward to working here. Boss: ??? Dilbert: I didn't like that guy. Wally: I'm glad we got our revenge in advance.
Tuesday August 25,
2015
Boss Falls Off Bridge
Tags walking, meeting, meetings, accident, difficult, gimmick, manager, idea, ideas, distraction, Sports, business
Transcript
Boss: My new thing is taking long walks instead of having meetings. Wow. It is hard to walk, read, think, talk, and drink coffee at the same time. Dilbert: He fell off a bridge. Carol: That's why I schedule walking meetings for him.