Freak Out Comic Strips - Page 32

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View 311 - 320 results for freak out comic strips. Discover the best "Freak Out" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, received, death, threats, patent, augmented, security, system, sidewalk, rigged, electric, shock, disarming, intruder, catapult, landfill, mail

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I've received death threats because of my new patent. So I augmented our home security system." Dilbert continues, "The sidewalk is rigged to give an electric shock, thus disarming the intruder. Then a spring catapults him to the city landfill." Outside, someone screams. Dilbert and Dogbert look out the window and see several envelopes falling onto the sidewalk. Dogbert says, "The mail is here."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, general, government, u.f.o., encounters, Lose, faith, aliens, abducting, people, helpless, maintain, confidence, taxes, citizens

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Dogbert and a man in a military uniform sit at the table. Dogbert says, "General, I don't understand why the government is trying to cover up all the U.F.O. encounters." The General replies, "People would lose faith in their government if they knew aliens were abducting people and we were helpless to stop them." Dogbert says, "So, to maintain confidence in the government, you use our taxes to kill the citizens who find out?" The General asks, "Is that so bad?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Wally, floyd, question, co-workers, chewed, clothes, synthetic, shock, healthy, eat

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Dilbert asks Wally, "What happened to you?" Wally's clothing is torn and tattered. Wally replies, "I asked Floyd a question." Wally continues, "Floyd hates his job, so he takes it out on co-workers. He almost chewed my clothes off." Dilbert asks, "How'd you stop him?" Wally replies, "He went into synthetic shock; it's not healthy to eat too much of this stuff."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, the boss, transferred, assignments, management, yanking, chain, over-communicating, manager, sales

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Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss says, "Dilbert, you're being temporarily transferred to the field sales organization." The Boss continues, "Normally we use these assignments to round somebody out for management. But in this case I'm just yanking your chain!" Dilbert says, "You're over-communicating again, sir." The Boss continues, "Plus, I hate the manager of sales."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, tina, sales, department, boss, new, hurt, customers, new guy, despise, account, i hate you

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A woman approaches Dilbert and says, "So . . . Dilbert, welcome to the sales department. I'm Tina, your new boss." Dilbert holds out his hand and says, "Hi." Tina says, "As the new guy, you get the customers who despise our products and want to hurt us personally." A man climbs onto Dilbert's back and beats him on the head while yelling, "I hate you! I hate you!" Tina says, "You'll be selling to the small business market. He's your best account."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags christmas presents, couch, holidays, shopping, support, Dilbert, stressed, eliminated, flabmaster, socks, commercials, christmas, muscle

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A frazzled man says to Dilbert, "Normally I'm all stressed out during the holidays, but not this year." The man continues, "I eliminated my shopping stress by getting everybody the 'Flabmaster Thigh-Toning Support Socks.'" Dilbert replies, "Their commercials sound better the closer you get to Christmas." The man says, "You can build muscle just lying on the couch!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags christmas presents, Dilbert, Dogbert, hat, crown, merry christmas, christmas, friend

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Dogbert sits on a pillow and Dilbert sits on the floor wearing his bathrobe. There is a present on the floor between them. Dogbert says, "Why should I open it? You already told me it's just a stupid hat." Dilbert replies, "Open it anyway." Dogbert opens the box and takes out a crown. Dogbert says, "Hey, it's not really a hat; it's a crown." Dogbert puts on the crown and says, "I'm not happy. I'm only humoring you." Dilbert says, "Merry Christmas, little friend."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, phone, pager, palm computer, personal, organizer, wireless, modem, envy, engineers, thesaurus

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Dilbert stands in front of the dresser wearing a belt with several pieces of electronic equipment attached to it. Dilbert says, "Let's see . . . I've got my cellular phone, my pager, palm computer, personal organizer, wireless modem . . ." Dilbert looks in the mirror and continues, "Yeah, I'd say I'm pretty much the envy of engineers everywhere . . . Looking good . . . Looking good . . ." Dogbert says, "Words escape me . . ." Dilbert takes something out of his belt and says, "Here, I'll fire up the old thesaurus."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags the boss, Dilbert, whales, extinct, hear, seeing-eye, fetch, paper, drag, mammals, burning, building

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Dilbert sits at his desk working on the computer. The Boss says, "Sometimes I wonder, how would MY life be different if all whales were extinct?" The Boss continues, "It's not like they do anything for us. You never hear of seeing-eye whales. They can't fetch the paper or drag you out of a burning building . . ." The Boss asks, "Don't you think the world has too many fat, worthless mammals?" Dilbert replies, "I was just thinking that, sir."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags the boss, peter, brilliant, computer, programmer, job, lack, social, communicate, species, necktie

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The Boss says to an employee, "Peter, you're a brilliant computer programmer and you like your job." The Boss continues, "Although you lack any social awareness and cannot communicate with your species, I decided to promote you to management." The Boss holds out a tie and says, "Don't be afraid . . . It's called a necktie." Peter shakes and cowers in his chair.