Hours Worked Comic Strips - Page 32

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View 311 - 320 results for hours worked comic strips. Discover the best "Hours Worked" comics from Dilbert.com.

Leadership And Guessing

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Leadership And Guessing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #coffee, #managers & supervisors, #office

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alice to the boss: one option is to use the old method that has never once worked, but we think we know how to make it work next time. alice: the other option is to try something new that we can't be sure will work. alice: it's almost as if leadership is nothing but guessing. the boss drinking coffee: let's change the subject.

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Wally Compared To A Placebo

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Wally Compared To A Placebo - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #project, #failure, #coincidence, #placebo, #insult

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boss: wally, i've noticed that every project you have worked on has failed. is that a coincidence? wally: it's hard to know. unless you compare me to a placebo. boss: okay, you're worse than a placebo. wally: i thought that would take longer.

Wally Stopped Trying

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Wally Stopped Trying - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #useless, #trying, #incompetence, #co-workers, #pay, #work

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wally: this week i didn't do any work because there is no point in trying. in the unlikely event i did something useful, it would be ruined by the massive incompetence of my co-workers. boss: i pay you to act as if you are trying. wally: oh, in that case, i worked hard this week.

Alice And Blockchain

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Alice And Blockchain - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #project, #learn, #skills

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alice: i'd like to help on the blockchain project to build my skills in that area. boss: i don't like it when people learn new things. alice: i don't know what to say to that. boss: oh, good. it worked.

Wally Rounds Off

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Wally Rounds Off - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #business, #work, #critical, #tasks, #failed, #enjoyment, #anger

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wally: i did no work this week because i had too many critical tasks to do. no matter what i worked on, i would have failed to do the other 99% of tasks that were equally critical. so i rounded it off to 100% and enjoyed my week. alice yelling: why do i work here??? why???

No Interruptions At Home

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No Interruptions At Home - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #business, #working, #home, #workday, #productivity, #anger, #annoying, #bowel, #problems

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dilbert sitting on couch with dogbert: i like working from home. i can do eight hours of work in one hour because no one is interrupting me. dogbert yelling: i'm trying to work here! dilbert: did i tell you about my bowel problems? dogbert: go away!

Five Pages Of Forms

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Five Pages Of Forms - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #salesman, #vendor, #application, #technology, #cancel, #order, #easy, #difficult, #signature

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vendor salesman: just fill out these five pages of information, and we're good to go. dilbert: no. cancel the order, and i'll find an easier vendor to work with. vendor salesman: in that case, all i need is your signature. dilbert: that worked? continued...

Refusing Works

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Refusing Works - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #refuse, #stupid, #power, #leash, #head, #sarcasm

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dilbert: yesterday i refused to do something i had been asked to do because it was stupid. and it worked out fine. wally: don't let the power go to your head. dilbert doing happy dance: i am off the leash! continued...

No Raise In Years

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No Raise In Years - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #job, #raise, #nine, #years, #face mask, #employment

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office worker: i've been working here for nine years, and you haven't given me a single raise! boss: i didn't even know you worked for me. obviously, you didn't do anything useful, or i would have noticed. office worker: well, in that case, i'm glad i didn't give my name.

Cushion In Schedule

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Cushion In Schedule - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #weekend, #work, #deadline, #due date, #schedule, #input, #critical, #liar, #credibility, #exaggerate

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dilbert: i worked all weekend to get this done for you by the deadline. boss: thanks, but i won't need it for another two weeks. dilbert: then...why did you tell me the deadline was today? boss: i built some cushion into the schedule. dilbert: you mean, you lied to me about the real deadline. in other words, you don't trust me, you are a liar, and i should never believe you again. boss: but you didn't miss the deadline! dilbert: okay, well, at least my input is critical to our success. boss: i might have exaggerated that.