Company Comic Strips - Page 33

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882 Results for Company

View 321 - 330 results for company comic strips. Discover the best "Company" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags company concierge, alibi, lye, a barrel, police, break you, legal

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An employee says to Ratbert the Concierge, "I need an alibi." The employee continues, "The police will try to beat the truth out of you, but don't let them break you!" The employee goes on, "I also need lye...and a barrel...better yet, make that two barrels."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags company a, dogbert consults, free sample, web strategy

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Dogbert the consultant says to the Boss, "Here's a free sample of my work." The Boss says to Dobgert as he reads the booklet, "So company 'A' was managed by idiots with no web strategy." The Boss asks Dogbert, "What would you recommend for my company?" Dogert replies, "First, change its name to 'A'.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags company identified, deadly falling satelites, investigative reporter, plan worked, falling satellites, hit target, boss thought plnned

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The Boss sits at home watching the evening news on television. "Our investigtive reporter has identified the company behind the deadly falling satellites." The television sounds: "Whump!" The next day at the office, the Boss says to Dilbert "Your plan worked." Dilbert replies, "What plan?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags no respect, work, send resume, located

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Dilbert says to Dogbert before leaving for work, "I'm tired of getting no respect at work." Dilbert continues, "I'm going to send my resume to a company that's locted in a place I'd never want to live." Dogbert says to Dilbert while reading the paper, "I wonder why they don't respect you." Dilbert answers angrily, "That's what I want to know!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags resume, sarcasm, slave to company, supportiveness, undesirable location, potential slave

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Dilbert works on his resume at work. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "There...my resume is done. I will no longer be a slave to my company." Dogbert, now irritated says to Dilbert, "Yeah! Now you're a potential slave for a company in an undesirable location!" Dilbert turns to look and Dogbert and asks, "Was that sarcasm or supportiveness?" Dogbert replies, "You only think there's a difference."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags poach employees, leave comapny, wink wink, moron

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The Boss says to Dilbert, "I'm not allowed to poach employees if I leave this company." The Boss continues as he winks at Dilbert, "But there's no law against you asking me for a job...wink...wink." The Boss begins yelling, "I'm not going to wink all day you moron!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags good manager, hires samrter, boss dumber, ceo, dumbest person, bad managers, doomed, motivational meeting, high five

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The Boss, Wally, Dilbert, Alice, and Asok are in a meeting. The Boss explains, "A good manager hires people who are smarter than he is." Wally asks, "So... your boss is dumber than you?" Alice asks, "And your boss' boss is dumber yet?" Then, Dilbert says, "According to your theory, our CEO is the dumbest person in the company." Wally adds, "Unless all of you are bad managers." And Asok says, "Truly we are doomed either way." The Boss responds, "This concludes the motivational part of the meeting." Wally says to the Boss, "I'd give you a high five but I don't like to move."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags employees, funerals, evil dierctor, heating costs, too high, company furnace, cremated, business

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Catbert the Evil HR Director says to the staff, "Employees waste too much time at funerals." Catbert continues, "On a related note, our heating costs are too high." Later at home, Dilert's mother says to Dilbert, "As a matter of fact, I would mind being cremated in the company furnace."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technical certificate, new power, better job, different comaony, hired you

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An employee says to the Boss, "Ha Ha! You never should have let me get a technical certification." The employee continues to explain, "I used my new power to get a better job at a different company." The Boss replies, "Tell me again why I hired you?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags forty million dollars, needs approval, over budget, whose side?

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Dilbert holds out a slip of paper to his Boss and says, "This needs your approval." The Boss looks at the piece of paper and Dilbert continues, "The company will save forty million dollars but you'll be ten thousand over budget." Dilbert says, "And before you ask, no it won't work the other way around." The Boss says, "Whose side are you on?"