Service Business Comic Strips - Page 33
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1000 Results for Service Business
View 321 - 330 results for service business comic strips. Discover the best "Service Business" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday May 23,
2001
Tags bar, burp, chug chardonnay, drinks, drunk, drunkards, gross, guzzled, hit on, pig, scene, sloshed, slurred words, strictly business, business man, date, animals
Transcript
Alice and a businessman sit at a bar. Alice says, "This is strictly business, right? We're going to talk about your company's product." The businessman raises his glass to Alice and says, "I bet I can drink for chardonnay than you can." Later, Alice's hair is completely dishevelled and both Alice and the businessman are slumped in their chairs, totally drunk. Alice says, "You're a hanshum man and so ish your twin bruver." The business man burps loudly.
Monday June 18,
2001
Tags meeting, monday morning, travel all day, stealing life, reschedule, social plans, business
Transcript
The Boss sits behind his desk and says, "I told them you would be at the meeting Monday morning." Dilbert says, "What?? That means I have to travel all day Sunday. You're stealing my life!" Dilbert sits on the couch in his robe eating. He turns to Dogbert and says, "Then he said if I had social plans he'd reschedule." Dogbert replies, "Ouch."
Thursday June 21,
2001
Tags loser, no girlfreind, business traveler, call, check her story, order food, waitress, hard time, restaurant
Transcript
Dilbert sits alone at a table in a restaurant. A waitress comes to take his order and he says, "I'm not a loser who can't get a date. I'm a business traveller." The waitress replies, "What's your girlfriend's name? I'll call her and check out your story." Dilbert, embarassed, looks down at his menu and says, "Maybe I should order." The waitress says, "Maybe you should."
Saturday June 30,
2001
Tags meeting, need bodies, outnumbered, marekting, bucket head, business
Transcript
Wally and Dilbert are walking by when the Boss signals for them to come with him and says, "Hey, Come to this meeting. I need some bodies." The Boss continues, "I don't want to be outnumbered by marketing." Dilbert, Wally, the Boss and another man sit at the table. A dummy body has been propped up next to Dilbert, with a bucket for a head. Dilbert turns and says, "Hi." The other man says, "He's on our side."
Tuesday July 03,
2001
Tags start on monday, service industry, space -time, contiuum, calendar, no mondays
Transcript
Dilbert stands at a table reviewing a sheet of paper with a contractor. The contractor says, "Here's my estimate. I'll start the job on Monday." The contractor continues, "When I say 'Monday,' I'm referring to the service industry's space-time continuum." The contractor holds out a calendar and says, "I'm not supposed to show you this, but check out the calendar." Dilbert looks and says, "No Mondays."
Wednesday July 04,
2001
Tags electrician, fix furnace, invention, plumber, roofer, space time continuum, carpenter, fix furnace 1991
Transcript
Dogbert stands on a stool watching as Dilbert fixes what looks like a time machine. Dilbert says, "My invention will let me search the service industry's space-time continuum." Dilbert is seen in the machine travelling through a galaxy with several floating workmen. Dilbert says, "Plumber, roofer, carpenter, electrician." Dilbert stops and looks at one worker and says, "Weren't you supposed to fix my furnace in 1991?" The worker replies, "You're my next house."
Monday July 09,
2001
Tags understaffed, over worked, stress counselor, another manager, massage, meeting, alice, business
Transcript
Alice sits looking frazzled as the Boss says, "You're understaffed and overworked." Two people appear behind the Boss as he continues, "So I hired a stress counselor and another manager to glare at you." The stress counselor massages the Boss' back and says, "Relax...Deep breaths...There..." The manager stands over Alice glaring at her.
Monday July 16,
2001
Tags life no purpose, scratch back, service to others, feel useful, found something, works
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert are sitting by the bank of a river. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "My life has no purpose." Dogbert responds, "Scratch my back." Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Are you saying the purpose of life is service to others?" Dogbert says "Okay." Dilberts says to Dogbert, "It does make me feel useful." Dogbert responds "I think we both found something that works."
Thursday July 19,
2001
Tags dinner, socially defective brain, voicemail, speakerphone
Transcript
Ron is sitting at his desk, using speakerphone to listen to his messages. The voice mail service is heard aloud, "Press one to hear." Alice approaches from behind and asks, "Why are you using your speakerphone for voice-mail?" She continues, annoyed, "I mean, seriously, what is going through that socially defective brain of yours?" Ron responds, "Would you like to have dinner?" To which Alice's answer is, "Yeah, why not."
Sunday August 12,
2001
Tags give decion, more information, study, get information, business case, justify funding, relief, other deadlines, laser like focus, customer
Transcript
Dilbert walks into The Boss' office and says, "You need to give me a decision." The Boss replies, "You need to give me more information." Dilbert replies, "You need to give me funding to do a study to get the information." The Boss replies, "You need to give me a business case to justify the spending." Dilbert replies, "You need to give me relief from my other deadlines so I can work on the funding request." The Boss replies, "You need to give me everything to infinity." At that, The Boss jumps up from his chair and screams, "I WIN! YES!" Dilbert says to Wally, "We might be losing our laser-like focus on the customer." Wally responds, "On the who?"


