Asok Comic Strips - Page 34
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Character
964 Results for Asok
View 331 - 340 results for Asok comic strips. Discover the best "Asok" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday November 16,
2009
Tags sitting, meeting, training, raising hand, firing, confused, surprised, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "Who needs training to keep up with technology trends?" Ted says, "Me." The Boss says, "You're fired. I only want people who already know how to do their jobs." Ted says, "I did not see that coming." Wally says, "They don't have a class to fix that."
Wednesday November 11,
2009
Tags ridicule, age, generation, blame, prediction, criticism, angry, annoyed
Transcript
Asok says, "Your age group has destroyed the hopes of my entire generation." Asok says, "Your parents were the so-called 'Greatest generation.' I wonder what your age group will be known as." Asok says, "I'll bet it includes the word 'Bag.'"
Monday November 02,
2009
Tags sitting, meeting, drugs, medicing, explaining, screaming, scared, stupidity, suggestion, business
Transcript
Man says, "My prescription meds cause drowsiness." Man says, "So I got a second prescription that causes phantom-hand syndrome to slap me at random intervals." Alice says, "Maybe you should use a doctor who has less-effective pharmaceutical reps in his territory." Man says, "Fist!"
Tuesday October 27,
2009
Tags asking, bonus, project, explaining, pandemic
Transcript
Asok says, "If I do a great job with the pandemic contingency planning, can I have a bonus?" The Boss says, "I won't know if you did a great job unless we actually have a pandemic emergency." Asok says, "So?if there is a pandemic, I might get a bonus?" The boss says, "I don't like where this is heading."
Monday October 26,
2009
Tags presentation, pandemic, illess, punching, scared, reassurance
Transcript
Pandemic Planning Asok says, "In the worst-case scenario, the only survivors would be cockroaches and Alice." Pow! Pow! Pow! Alice says, "Airborne virus. It's safe now. I broke it's proteing coat."
Saturday October 24,
2009
Tags assignment, plan, inefficiency, ridicule, Advice
Transcript
the Boss says, "Asok, I'm putting you in charge of pandemic contingency planning." The Boss says, "Calculate the impact on our business if 50% of our employees are unable to be productive." Asok says, "That's twice as good as we're doing now." The Boss says, "Just make some slides that say it would be bad."
Tuesday October 06,
2009
Tags job, panic, phrase, angry, offended, accusation, awkward, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "Asok, we're hosting a forum for human resources executives, and I need you to organize it." Asok the intern says, "Gaaa!!! That will be like trying to herd cats." Catbert says, "What did you just say?" Asok the intern says, "I'm not racist." Catbert says, "Denial is proof!"
Sunday September 27,
2009
Tags job, meeting, circular, ridiculous, talking, explaining, angry, annoyed, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "Dilbert, I want you to develop a procedure for creating policies." Dilbert says, "Do we have a policy on how to develop procedures?" The Boss says, "I think someone wrote a white paper on that." Dilbert says, "What's the procedure for finding white papers?" The Boss says, "Maybe you could ask around." Later that night Woman says, "So, what do you do?" Dilbert says, "I ask around to see if anyone knows about a white paper that talks about a policy for developing procedures to create policies." Dilbert thinks, "You find that sexy." Woman says, "Stop doing the Jedi mind trick!"
Thursday September 24,
2009
Saturday August 29,
2009
Tags orders, demands, work, ridiculous, confused
Transcript
The Boss says, "Asok, rummage through the piles on my desk and find yourself something to do." The boss says, "Afterward, chastise yourself for not doing it the way I would have." Asok says, "Even if you would have done it wrong?" The boss, "Especially then. No one likes a show-off."


