2005 Comic Strips - Page 34
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Character
Friday February 04,
2005
Tags human resources, change name, workplace, evil enough, evil laugh, business
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources "I might change my department's name." "To "Workplace Services." BU-WHA-HA-HA-HA!!" "When things don't sound evil enough on their own, I like to toss in a bu-wha-ha-ha-ha."
Thursday February 03,
2005
Tags bad service, fire people, sexy, ceo of company
Transcript
I keep getting bad service at stores. "Do what I do."<br."I say I'm the CEO of their company and then I fire them all." "You don't look like a CEO." "Too sexy?"
Wednesday February 02,
2005
Tags award, hard work, chair, new chair, stolen, happiest moment
Transcript
The Boss: This award goes to Asok for his hard work on ... Whatever. Asok: "My dedication has been rewarded! This is the happiest moment of my life!" "Wow! It's lucky that I got a new chair on the same day that mine was stolen."
Tuesday February 01,
2005
Tags furry log, nick name, cute names, creating hostile environment, squirrel infested stump
Transcript
The Boss: "Alice, did you call the director of human resources a "furry log"?" Alice: "Yes" The Boss: "I can't tell if you're promoting teamwork with a cute nickname or creating a hostile environment." "Which is it?" Alice: "It's teamwork, you squirrel-infested stump."
Monday January 31,
2005
Tags eating at desk, furry log, stealing from company
Transcript
CatBert: "Eating at your desk is like stealing from the company, Alice." Alice: "I'm working through my lunch hour, you furry log." Catbert: "Furry log?" Alice: "It's a term of endearment."
Sunday January 30,
2005
Tags vacation schedule, more than accrued, actual vacation, remain upbeat, quit, quit on vacation, slavery
Transcript
"Here's my vacation schedule." "Good." "Whoa! You're planning to take more vacation days than you've accrued." "It's okay because I'll accrue the days before the actual vacation." "No can do. What if you quit before then?" "I'm literally afraid to hear the answer to that question." "Think, man! If you quit and have vacation at the same time..." "I'LL BE DOWN TWO PEOPLE!!!" "It's hard to remain upbeat." "Do you still live here?"
Saturday January 29,
2005
Tags broken promises, scammers, lies, vendor, salesman, telling lies, deadlines, software, few extras, unfinished features, engineering
Transcript
Vendor: We'll build your software with all the features you want plus a few extras. Dilbert: "Or maybe you'll start late and claim there's no way to do everything by the deadline." "Then you'll say that the unfinished features aren't important and you're losing money on the deal." Vendor: "I can't hear you."
Friday January 28,
2005
Tags response to letter, apologize, admits error, starting war, mean spirit, hating minorities
Transcript
Carol: "Hey, I got a response from the newspaper columnist I reamed for misusing the word "dongle."" ""Dear Nutbag... Link to a dictionary..." Um... Oops... It appears that I was wrong." "Now do you apologize?" "Plan B: I accuse him of hating minorities."
Thursday January 27,
2005
Tags scathing letter, coulmnist, dongle, vebal superiority, feel alive, dear nutbag
Transcript
Carol: I just fired off a scathing letter to a columnist for misusing the word "dongle". Im intoxicated with the feeling of verbal superiority. My sad life has meaning , I feel alive! The columnist: Dear Nutbag, Thanks for the input, Heres a link yo a dictionary, I await your apology


