Jury Room Comic Strips - Page 34

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376 Results for Jury Room

View 331 - 340 results for jury room comic strips. Discover the best "Jury Room" comics from Dilbert.com.

Memorial Service For Ted

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Memorial Service For Ted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags funerals, memorial, cake, ballons, tasteful, mime, pretend, invisible box, hire entertainment, clueless

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Boss: I need you to organize some sort of memorial thing for Fred. Carol: You mean Ted. Boss: I'm thinking cake and balloons in the break room. Is that tasteful enough? Carol: I could hire a mime to pretend he's in an invisible box.

Scott's Birthday Cake

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Scott's Birthday Cake - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags joy, joyless, cruelty, birthday, cynicism, cynic

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Carol: We've got a cake in the break room for Scott's birthday. Dilbert: I see no reason to celebrate the random timing of natural events by eating poison and singing. Carol: Ow! You sucked all of the joy out of my body! Dilbert: Maybe you can backfill it with cake.

Dilbert And The Prison Gang

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Dilbert And The Prison Gang - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags prison, lawyer, attorney, Advice, plead, trial, crime, murder, technicality, guilt, legal

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Dogbert: Your brain stimulator invention turned you into a murderer. I will argue that you can't get a fail trial by jury of your peers because all of the people like you are already in jail for doing their own stupid stuff. And I signed you up for a prison gang. All you need to do is skin a snitch.

Robots Will Do The Dangerous Jobs

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Robots Will Do The Dangerous Jobs - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags rights, civil liberties, technology, robots, abuse, bias

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CEO: Our plan is to use robots for all the jobs that are dangerous or demeaning. No one cares if a robot gets ripped to shreds in an industrial accident. Robot: Eh? CEO: Are we cool? Robot: I'm cool, but you're going to be room temperature.

Wally Gets A Man Cave

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Wally Gets A Man Cave - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags nursing, babies, man cave, deception, children, office policy, Family

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Wally: We should have a private lactation room like other companies. Alice: Yes, we should. Boss: No one in my group is nursing a baby. Wally: What about visitors? Alice: Right. Wally: Thanks for helping me get my man cave at the office. Alice: What?

Wally Goes To His Man Cave

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Wally Goes To His Man Cave - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags lactation, man cave, nursing, deception, baby, trick

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Wally: I secretly turned our unused lactation room into my man cave. Dilbert: What if someone sees you go in? Tina: You said only once, right? Wally: Once per day.

Dogbert's Reality Show

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Dogbert's Reality Show - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags television, reality, cell phone, battery, charging, Entertainment, technology

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Dogbert: I'm creating a reality TV show about ten people locked in a room with one electrical outlet. The central tension will revolve around their daily struggle to charge their phones. Dilbert: Is violence allowed? Dogbert: No, but my producers get a big bonus if it happens anyway.

Don't Harm The Artificial Soul

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Don't Harm The Artificial Soul - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags soul, drone, artificial intelligence, frustration, death, medical

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Dilbert: Pay no attention to the drone. That's where I keep my artificial soul. It's still in beta, so please don't say anything that might harm it. Boss: Let's go around the room and give our project updates. Drone: Pow!

Tina Wants To Borrow Wally's Phone

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Tina Wants To Borrow Wally's Phone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cell phone, germs, cleanliness, bathroom, technology

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Tina: My phone is broken. Can I use yours to make a call? Wally: Absolutely. If it seems warm, that's because I was using it in the men's room for the past two hours. Tina: I'll ask someone else. Wally: Yup.

Boss Cancels Food Service

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Boss Cancels Food Service - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags lunch, Food, stealing, refrigerator, property, misunderstanding

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Boss: I've decided to cancel our food service to save money. Dilbert: We don't have a food service. We all bring our own food and keep in the break room refrigerator. Boss: I've been eating the food in there for seven years. Dilbert: I'd keep that to myself if I were you.