New Employee Comic Strips - Page 34

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for New Employee

View 331 - 340 results for new employee comic strips. Discover the best "New Employee" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags share knowledge, new intranet, collaboration software, knowledge to share, hurst, true, hoarding

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok says to Dilbert and Wally, "Who wants to share knowlege with me via our new intranet collaboration software?" Dilbert says to Asok, "You don't have any knowledge to share." Asok replies, "Ouch. It hurts because it's true." Wally says to Dilbert, "I'm hoarding my knowledge in case I ever need it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags employee of month, lulu, overcame odds, to win, name randomly picked, victory, last month

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: The employee of the month is LULU. LULU overcame long odds to win this award. I.E. her name was randomly picked. Wally: Id protest but I don't want to taint my victory of last month.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags judging people, meet new guy, training him, giant amoeba

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: dilbert , meet the new guy. Dilbert: You hired a giant amoeba? The Boss: You can't go around judging people by their looks. The Boss: Would you mind... Dilbert: Training him? Boss: Keeping him moist?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags single cell organism, new hire, break room, pretending

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: So, I hear you're a single cell organism. Whats up with that? Alice: The new guy is rolling into a ball and shedding water. Dilbert: Been there.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags architectural materpiece, experience, no storage espace, new office building, architectectural masterpiece

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss is standing beside an easel that has a picture of a building on it. The boss, pointing to the picture says, "Our new office building will be an architectural masterpiece!" Asok the Intern, Dilbert, and Wally are sitting at a table. Asok holds his head and says, "The voices in my head are shouting 'No storage space! No storage space!'" Asok shouts, "What is happening to me?" Dilbert says, "It's called experience."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new guy, rude or shy, rudy, shilo, don't know name, boss introductions, no one knows, name him

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss is standing with a worker and says to Dilbert, "Here's the new guy. I don't know his name." The boss continues, "He's either rude or shy. No one knows for sure." The boss says, "If you figure it out, name hime either Shilo or Rudy."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags 30 day dance of death, new job within, spray paint

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert, standing on a table, says to Ted, "Ted, your thirty-day dance of death begins today." Shaking a bottle of spray-paint, Catbert says, "You must find a new job within the company during that time." As Catbert spray-paints the letter 'L' on Ted's chest, Ted says, "Is the spray-paint absolutely necessary?" Catbert says, "That's an 'L'."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new job, starts with l, window shuts, company, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is staring at his computer screen. Ted has the letter 'O' painted on his chest. Ted says to Dilbert, "I need a new job within the company before the window shuts." Ted says, "Catbert is already up to 'O.' Next week he gets an 'S'." Dilbert asks, "What's he spelling?" Ted says to Dilbert, "He wouldn't say, but it starts with an 'L'."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags genetic anamolies, genetic engineering, grow on, hand growing on head, new temp, temp agnecy, wear goggles

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: The Dogbert temp agency uses genetic engineering to grow our own workers. The Boss: Isn't that dangerous? Dogbert: I wear safety goggles. Temp: Im the new temp. Alice: Um Im alice.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags alice, hand, head, new temp, new temp likes, shakes hand on head

View Transcript

Transcript

New Temp: Its a pleasure to meet you Alice. OOWEE!! That was a good hand shake.