2005 Comic Strips - Page 34
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Character
Sunday November 27,
2005
Tags buiness stragey, list, past years, no afraid of change, deserve bonus, generous, good looking, rhetorical question
Transcript
Our new business strategy is... "Hold on." "I made a list of all of our strategies for the past five years." "There have been seventeen of them." "What does that tell us?" "That I'm not afraid of change." "And that I've been working hard and I deserve a huge bonus." "And that I'm kind and generous and good looking." "You have to give him credit. The man knows how to answer a rhetorical question."
Monday November 28,
2005
Tags clone themsleves, unethical, morality, self causing, accepted norms, garbageman
Transcript
"Why is it unethical for humans to clone themselves?" "Morality is based on accepted norms. And accepted norms are based on morality." "It's self causing?" "Ironically, yes."
Tuesday November 29,
2005
Tags two ceos, top job, syockholders, average employees slaary
Transcript
"After the merger, we'll have two CEOs sharing the top job." "A spokesperson explained 'If our stockholders don't mind paying one CEO 450 times the average employee's salary..." "...They shouldn't mind doing it twice.'"
Wednesday November 30,
2005
Tags after merger, job of ceo, old married couple
Transcript
"After the merger, we'll be sharing the job of CEO." "We get along great, just like an old married couple. Ha ha ha!" "He's the wife."
Thursday December 01,
2005
Tags bad mood, all the time, showing interest, not working
Transcript
"So, what's it like to be in a bad mood all of the time?" "Something tells me that showing interest isn't working."
Friday December 02,
2005
Tags hammerhead bob, start butting into private lives, sense annoyance
Transcript
"Great. The only seat is next to Hammerhead Bob." "I'm learning ESP so I can start butting into people's private thoughts." "I sense annoyance, yet there seems to be no cause."
Saturday December 03,
2005
Tags hammerhead bob, expert, many topics, not welcome, converstaion, irritable, dadelion root, cramp root
Transcript
Hammerhead Bob "Hey, what are you talking about? I'm an expert on many topics." "Try to get this through your thick head: You are not welcome in our conversation." "Irritable, eh? Try cramp bark and dandelion root."
Sunday December 04,
2005
Tags career criminal, appkying, job, tendonitis, pistol whipping arm, slower paced, lifel, embezzle, job security, business
Transcript
Your resume says you're a career criminal. "Yup." "Um...why are you applying for a job here?" "I'm getting tendonitis in my pistol-whipping arm." "I thought I'd try the slower paced life of white collar crime." "Security." "How much can I expect to embezzle in my first year?" "Earl?" "Lefty!" "Forget this job. Security is where the big money is." "Can you get me in?" "I should start locking my desk."
Monday December 05,
2005
Tags cross charging, freshly brewed coffee, tempting pasteries, time to project, meeting, wrong meeting, mis placed, business
Transcript
Um...Why are you here? "Originally I was seduced by the smell of your freshly brewed coffee and tempting pastries." "But now I'm all about cross-charging my time to your project."
Tuesday December 06,
2005
Tags evil director, human rescources, disgruntled, bad management, commute, rationalizer, employee, commute is easy
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources "Ed, you seem disgruntled." "You need 30 minutes in the Employee Rationalizer." "I...I...don't mind bad management because...the commute is easy." "Better."


