Managers & Supervisors Comic Strips - Page 35

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

469 Results for Managers & Supervisors

View 341 - 350 results for managers & supervisors comic strips. Discover the best "Managers & Supervisors" comics from Dilbert.com.

No Raise In Years

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
No Raise In Years   - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, job, raise, nine, years, face mask, employment

View Transcript

Transcript

office worker: i've been working here for nine years, and you haven't given me a single raise! boss: i didn't even know you worked for me. obviously, you didn't do anything useful, or i would have noticed. office worker: well, in that case, i'm glad i didn't give my name.

Deep Disrespect For Authority

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Deep Disrespect For Authority  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags interview, managers & supervisors, question, weakness, disrespect, authority, surprise

View Transcript

Transcript

boss wearing face mask: what would you say are your weaknesses? office worker: i have a deep disrespect for authority. boss: but...you don't act on it, right? office worker: let's not take the surprise out of it.

Bad Judge Of Character

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Bad Judge Of Character  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, bad, judge, character, hire, termite, clothes, disguise, youtube, makeup, video

View Transcript

Transcript

boss wearing face mask: i'm starting to think i'm a bad judge of character. the last three people i hired turned out to be termite colonies in clothes. dilbert in face mask: how did they disguise the face part? boss: they learned from youtube makeup videos.

We Have No Strategy

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
We Have No Strategy  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, business, strategy, meeting, complain, cheap, jealous, wisdom

View Transcript

Transcript

boss wearing face mask: i hired a guy to complain at every meeting by saying, "we have no strategy."mi got him cheap because that's all he does. dilbert wearing face mask: some would say we don't need him. boss: maybe they're jealous of his wisdom. office worker thinking: no strategy

Ratio Is Too High

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ratio Is Too High - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, expense, budget, capital, ratio, too high, afford, standards, historical, irrelevant, manage, department

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: we need to reduce our expense budget to 40% of our capital budget. dilbert: why do we need to do that? boss: because the ratio is too high. dilbert: are you saying we can't afford it? boss: no. i'm saying the ratio is too high. dilbert: okay, but by what standard is it "too high"? boss: by historical standards, it has never been this high. dilbert: i don't think we want to start using an irrelevant ratio to manage the department. boss: to be fair, this is just the first time you noticed.

Boss Using Phone

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Using Phone   - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cell phone, distraction, managers & supervisors, sarcasm, technology, business, disrespect, hear, face mask

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: are you listening to me? it looks as if you are using your phone. boss: i can do two things at once. dilbert: i'll bet you can't even hear me, you ridiculous moron. boss: uh-huh uh-huh go on. dilbert: you smell like old socks, and your brain is made of cheese.

Dilbert Can Answer Questons

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 Dilbert Can Answer Questons  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags answer, business, delegate, face mask, managers & supervisors, meeting, project, question, sarcasm, awkward

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: dilbert can answer any of your questions, but i have another meeting. dilbert: not really. i have no involvement in the project. he just told me to follow him to this room. co-worker: well, this is awkward. dilbert: how about i go to the restroom and never come back?

Asok Analysis

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 Asok Analysis  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business ethics, decision, managers & supervisors, numbers, analysis, experience, liars, department

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: put some numbers on this decision so it looks a if we thought about it longer. asok: are you seriously telling me to do the analysis after the decision? boss: if you need help, talk to one of the experienced liars in the department.

Offer 90 Percent Less

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 Offer 90 Percent Less  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, sarcasm, price, list, stupid, impact, face mask, business

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: try offering 90% less than the list price and see if they take it. dilbert: no one reduces their prices by 90% just because you want them to do it. i will look stupid for asking! boss: watch how that doesn't impact me at all.

Boss Doesn't Understand

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
  Boss Doesn't Understand - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, technology, server, migration, difficult, understand, question, face maks

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: can you finish the server migration by monday? dilbert: no way. boss: how hard can it be? dilbert: you only say that about things you don't understand. boss: i ask that question every day. dilberty: yup.