Read List Comic Strips - Page 35

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

354 Results for Read List

View 341 - 350 results for read list comic strips. Discover the best "Read List" comics from Dilbert.com.

Wally And His Priorities

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally And His Priorities - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #meetings, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: wally, can you attend a meeting at 10 am tomorrow? wally: sure. here's a list of my projects so you can tell me which one you want to fail while i'm wasting my time at your meeting. the boss: was there a chance one of them would succeed? wally: well played

Average Idiot

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Average Idiot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #budget, #business, #office, #user interface, #idiot

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: did you read my suggestions on the user interface? dilbert: yes, but we'll need a bigger budget if you want to make the user interface so easy that even you can use it. the boss: just make it so the average idiot can use it. dilbert: we did, but we didn't anticipate any below-average idiots.

Did You Get My Email

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Did You Get My Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #email, #managers & supervisors, #office, #talking

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: did you read my email? dilbert: yes. dilbert: are you aware that email is a substitute for talking in person? the boss thinking: i thought i heard something about that.

Ai That Creates Comics

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ai That Creates Comics - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Comic Strip, #inventions, #sarcasm, #technology, #creativity

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I invented an A.I. that can create comic strips. Boss: Pffft! That's impossible. No machine will ever match the creative genius of human cartoonists. Dilbert: This one is about a guy who thinks his boss is dumb. Boss: No one wants to read that.

Your Real Scheme

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Your Real Scheme - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #office, #business, #scheme, #power, #costs, #mind, #reader, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: and this method will reduce costs by thirty percent. ted: nice try, but i know your real scheme is to grab power. dilbert: you're not a good mind reader ted: and yet i knew you would say i can't read minds, explain that

Tina Enters Coma

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Tina Enters Coma - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #business, #technology, #write, #body, #language, #read

View Transcript

Transcript

tina the tech writer tina: in simple terms, tell me how the technology works, so i can write about it. one hour later dilbert pointing to flow chart: and that's how it all...uh-oh. if i am reading your body language correctly, you're saying i could have shortened that. continued...

Mind Reading

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Mind Reading - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #judge, #ruling, #gavel, #proof, #thoughts, #unfair, #mind, #reading

View Transcript

Transcript

court of stupidity judge with gavel: the court rules that dilbert should magically know what his boss wants at all times. dilbert: i'm not a mind-reader! judge: prove it! dilbert: how can i prove i can't read minds? judge: easy. tell me what i'm not thinking.

Mind Reader

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Mind Reader - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #plan, #sabotage, #mind reader, #success, #apology

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i don't think your plan will work. employee: pffft. of course you don't. you are trying to sabotage me because you are jealous of my success. dilbert: you read minds as well as you make plans. employee: apology accepted.

Bring Me Solutions

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Bring Me Solutions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #solutions, #problems, #worthless, #sarcasm, #example

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: i want you to bring me solutions, not problems! dilbert: that's a funny way to call yourself worthless. boss: i do plenty around here! boss: but in the interest of time, i will not list any examples.

What Good Is Money

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
What Good Is Money - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #sarcasm, #income, #soul, #money, #earn, #rent, #own

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert on couch at home: what good is earning money if it costs me my soul? dogbert: well, for one thing, it's the only way you can pay your rent. dilbert: rent? i own this house. dogbert: you really should read the things i ask you to docusign.