tina: i'll be in your neighborhood saturday, maybe i'll stop by.
dilbert: i'm not falling for that trick.
tina: what trick?
dilbert: the trick where you give me an estimated time and then push it back seven times until you cancel. i'll be stuck waiting at home until my whole day is wasted.
tina: i promise i won't do that. i'll stick to the time.
dilbert: what time is that?
tina: depends how my day goes.
dilbert thinking: and so it begins.
tina: i'll text you if i'm running late.
boss: i couldn't help noticing you are having a heated discussion. watch me use my conflict resolution skills to lower the temperature. okay, what were you idiots yammering about?
tina: solid start.
boss: when you write the project summary, make it seem as if we didn't make any mistakes.
tina: you want me to lie? that would be a massive ethical violation.
boss: no, no. i only want you to omit important context.
tina: why does my stomach hurt?
tina: is it lying if i leave out important context from my project updates?
dogbert: that's called "business lying" and it is totally acceptable.
tina: but it makes me feel sick.
dogbert: that's how you know you are doing it right.
tina tying on laptop computer: "no one on the project team could have foreseen that the problem that..."
tina's soul: you are a lying piece of garbage.
tina: who said that?
tina's soul: it's your soul. we can't hang out anymore.
tina: fine. you were slowing me down.
tina: why did you tell our boss i have the wrong people on my project?
dilbert: i didn't say that. in fact, i don't even know what you project is trying to accomplish, much less who is working with you on it. will we now proceed as if you didn't hear me say that?
tina upset: they are not the wrong people.
tina: the dunning-kruger effect is strong in you.
dilbert: technically, you can't know if i am suffering from it or if you only think i am because you have it.
tina: only a narcissist talks that way.
dilbert: i feel as if i have no path to glory here.
dilbert: where do you want to go to lunch?
tina: i want you to suggest a place so i can say yes but still make you feel bad about it.
dilbert: how about the thai place?
tina: pffft. sure. i'm not that hungry anyway.
dilbert: why is your writing so angry?
tina: tech writers are underpaid, so all of our envy and contempt spill out on the page.
dilbert: maybe you tech writers should drink less coffee and exercise more.
tina: this is exactly why we hate everyone.
Tina: i almost got some information from carl. i stalked him to his cubicle and penetrated his outer defense of rudeness. but i never broke through his mumble layer.
dilbert: wait until you get to his ignorance layer.
