Arms Out Comic Strips - Page 35

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, ceo, diferently, interpret, gesture, mahoney, window

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Dilbert walks down the hall and thinks, "Now that I'm CEO, everybody treats me differently." Dilbert thinks, "They interpret and act upon my slightest gesture. This gesture means 'all is well.'" Behind Dilbert there is a scream and a crash. An employee says, "We tossed Mahoney out the window like you gestured, sir." Dilbert thinks, "Oops."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, sarcasm, nostradogbert, turmoil, middle east, ratbert, limb, sand

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Dogbert, who is wearing a turban, says to Ratbert, "Nostradogbert predicts there will be turmoil in the Middle East." Ratbert replies, "Wow! That's quite a prediction! You're really going out on a limb!" Dogbert asks, "Is that sarcasm? I can't tell with you." Ratbert asks, "Will there be any sand involved?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, technology, Dilbert, tiny, pcs, phone, phones, new, newest, call, progress, annoying

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Dilbert says, "Dogbert, I got tiny 'PCS' phones for both of us." Dilbert continues, "It's the newest technology! I'll be able to call you at any time, no matter where we are!" The phone sits on the pillow next to Dogbert. As it rings, Dogbert thinks, "Why must all progress start out as something annoying?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Wally, nardo, old country, personal space, hands, pockets

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Wally says to Dilbert, "Uh-oh, Nardo is coming. I'm out of here." Nardo and Dilbert stand nose-to-nose. Dilbert says, "Uh, hi, Nardo." Nardo says, "In the old country we did not have what you call personal space." Dilbert says, "Take your hands out of my pockets." Nardo says, "Oh, I get it. They're for your use only, right?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, elf, elves, magic, elf magic, Dogs, fear, respect, bunny, hat, karl, bug

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An elf holding a top hat says to Dogbert, "Fear us, dog! We elves are magic. Watch this!" The elf pulls a giant rabbit out of the hat. The other elves run away. The elves are bruised and their clothes are tattered. An elf says, "I think we had the dog's fear and respect . . . Until the bunny made Karl eat a bug."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, secret, ratbert, dog, rat, elf, gang, disguise, infiltrate, hand shake, heckuva, guess

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Dogbert says, "Ratbert, I want you to wear a disguise and infiltrate the elf gang that has been bothering us." Ratbert replies, "Check." An elf says to Ratbert who is wearing an elf hat and clothing, "We haven't seen you before . . . " Another elf asks, "What's the secret handshake?" Ratbert bends over and waves his arms. The elf says, "No, but that's one heckuva good guess."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, prisoner, built, ladder, dental, floss, rich, clever

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A prisoner whispers to another prisoner, "Pssst . . . I'm planning an escape." The man continues, "I've secretly built a ladder out of dental floss." The other man replies, "Ha! And they say the rich aren't clever."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, flush, goldie, john, ugly, stupid, fish, life, rivalry, suicide note, schools, pun

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Dilbert stands in front of an empty fishbowl with his arms on his hips. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "You expect me to believe that Goldie flushed HIMSELF down the john??!" Dogbert replies, "Surely you don't believe that I ended his ugly, stupid fish life in a fit of pet rivalry . . ." Dilbert looks at a small piece of paper and says, "Explain how a fish can write a suicide note." Dogbert says, "I've heard they have schools . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, pants, clothes, dresser, bad, robot, wrong, underpants, drapes

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A robot enters wearing overalls and says to Dilbert, "I made some pants out of the clothes in your dresser." Dilbert shakes his finger and says, "Bad robot!! I want you to tell me why what you did was wrong." The robot pulls his underwear out of his pants and says, "It's not wrong. I remembered to make underpants out of the drapes."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags garbageman, Dilbert, Dogbert, taunting, mercilessly, calibrated, commands, nothing

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Dogbert says to the garbage man, "Our robot is taunting Dilbert mercilessly. Is there any way to stop him?" The garbage man says, "I meant to tell you; I calibrated his neuro-actuator so he would obey only YOUR commands, Dogbert." The robot dangles Dilbert out of the window by his legs. Dilbert asks Dogbert, "What did he say?" Dogbert replies, "He says there's nothing you can do."