Idea To Eliminate Comic Strips - Page 35

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

360 Results for Idea To Eliminate

View 341 - 350 results for idea to eliminate comic strips. Discover the best "Idea To Eliminate" comics from Dilbert.com.

Bias For Action

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Bias For Action - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #waste, #time, #thought, #chairs, #meeting

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: We need to have a bias for action! Alice: Good idea. This meeting is a total waste of time. The Boss: I probably should have thought that through.

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Sabotage The Plan

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Sabotage The Plan - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #engineering, #managers & supervisors, #plan, #sabatoge, #incompetent

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: We know our boss's plan is a bad idea, but it's our job to execute anyway. Wally: Maybe we should try to sabotage the plan by being incompetent. Dilbert: Since when do you need a reason to be incompetent? Wally: It's more of a "nice but not necessary" situation.

Jargon

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Jargon - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #confusion, #employees, #irritation, #language, #meetings, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: This was a great meeting. Are there any questions? Dilbert: I didn't understand any of the jargon you used for the past hour, so I have no idea what this meeting was about. Man: Why didn't you say something sooner? Dilbert: That's a good strategy for people who have hope.

Sarcasm Empty Vessel

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Sarcasm Empty Vessel - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #jokes, #office workers, #sarcasm, #millennial, #smartphone

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Wow, that's a great idea. Let's just do that! LOL! Dilbert: I've noticed that you are nothing but an empty vessel for transporting sarcasm. Man: Oooh! I'm such an empty vessel! LOL! Dilbert: I don't know what to do with all of this.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boredom, #panic, #technology, #smartphone, #thoughts

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'm turning off my digital devices so I can spend some time with my thoughts. Dogbert: That sounds like a terrible idea. Do you remember what your quiet thoughts were like? Dilbert: Not really. But how bad could it be? This isn't so bad. Just a bit boring. Five minutes later. Dilbert: I'm getting the shakes. The boredom has metastasized. Gaaaa!!! The boredom is overwhelming! Kill me! Kill me! Dogbert: Maybe you should have tried being with people. Dilbert: It was already bad enough.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #distraction, #exercise & fitness, #frustration, #lunch, #office workers, #time, #walking, #coworkers

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Would you like to take a long walk with me at lunch to get some exercise? Tina: That's a great idea! Dilbert: Okay, I'll come get you at noon. Ready? Tina: Yes, I only need ten minutes to finish this. Dilbert: I only have an hour for lunch, and your ten minutes will turn into twenty. Tina: That's okay because I wore heels today and I can't walk more than a block anyway. Dilbert: Why did you agree to take a long walk if you couldn't take a long walk? Tina: Because I was planning to walk to the store on the corner to do an errand anyway. Dilbert: You've ruined my walk! Tina: Just give me forty minutes to wrap this up.

Dilbert Feels Overwhelmed

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Feels Overwhelmed - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #life, #office, #office workers, #panic, #overwhelmed

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'm feeling overwhelmed by all the things I need to get done. Boss: Have you tried eliminating your personal life? Dilbert: That took care of itself. Boss: Okay, that's the only idea I had.

Twitch Gets You More Work

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Twitch Gets You More Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #communication, #office, #office workers, #project

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: does anyone have an idea for fixing our communication problem with marketing? dilbert, alice, wally and asok thinking: must...not...speak or else he will assign the project to me. the boss: i saw your eye twitch. the project is all yours. alice: GAAAA!!! visually upset

Why Are Other Companies Not Doing It

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Why Are Other Companies Not Doing It - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office, #company, #variables

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss to dilbert: if your idea is so good, why aren't other companies doing it? dilbert: because they are in completely different businesses with completely different variables and they don't have a genius like me working for them. the boss: what happens if we try your idea but we do it wrong? dilbert: that's called "business as usual."

The Opinionated Old Guy

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
The Opinionated Old Guy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #employees, #internet & world wide web, #old, #Opinion

View Transcript

Transcript

the opinionated old guy: that idea will never work! unless you know some kind of "magic" that sends data through the air. dilbert: i call it wi-fi. opinionated old guy: pffft! no one wants that.