Coolest Guy Comic Strips - Page 36
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375 Results for Coolest Guy
View 351 - 360 results for coolest guy comic strips. Discover the best "Coolest Guy" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday December 19,
2015
Alice's List
Tags #society, #murder, #violence, #law, #enemy, #revenge, #apocalypse
Transcript
Alice: Looks like I'll be adding this guy to my list. Dilbert: List? Alice: I keep a list of who to visit first when society breaks down and there is no rule of law. Dilbert: To build alliances? Alice: That's the sort of optimism that gets you killed in the first hour.
Wednesday December 30,
2015
The Stem Gender Imbalance Explained
Tags #gender, #Women, #technology, #equality, #gross, #repulsion
Transcript
Robot: Researchers discovered why women are under-represented in stem careers. It's this guy. Wally: I used to cut my toenails every week, now I just wear bigger shoes. Woman: I quit.
Monday March 21,
2016
Boss Gets Message From Identity Thief
Tags #identity theft, #internet, #racism, #reputation, #guest artist, #joel friday, #technology
Transcript
Boss: They guy who stole my identity just sent me an email. He says, "Stop making racist comments on the internet. You're ruining my reputation." Ha! Take that! Carol: You always said it would pay off someday.
Saturday April 09,
2016
New Ted
Tags #hiring, #generic, #job, #placeholder, #disposable, #guest artist, #brenna thummler, #business
Transcript
Ted: My name is Ted. I'm applying for this job of generic white guy. Boss: We just lost our Ted. You look perfect for the job. Ted: Is there anything I should know about the job? Boss: It doesn't end well.
Sunday July 10,
2016
Tags #Advice, #workload, #stress, #counseling
Transcript
Dilbert: I have too much work, and it's stressing me out. Boss: I've been reading about this sort of situation. Try writing don all the things that make you feel grateful. Dilbert: That would be more work! Boss: For your anger issues, try keeping a journal of all the times you lose your temper. Dilbert: That would be more work! Has anyone ever taken your advice? Boss: Do you know the guy in Marketing with the eye patch? Dilbert: He followed your advice? Boss: Half of it.
Sunday July 17,
2016
Tags #technology, #learning, #education, #tutorial, #frustration
Transcript
Dilbert: I love living in a world where everything I need to know is on the Internet. I'll just hop over to YouTube and learn how to use my new app. Perfect! I can choose from over a hundred different tutorials! It will only take me an hour or so to figure out which one refers to my version of the software. Narrator: One hour later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! These videos are poorly labeled! Narrator: Two hours later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! This guy talks too slowly! Get to the point! Narrator: Three hours later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! Why are my menu options different from the tutorial? I hate living in a world where everything I need to know is on the Internet.
Saturday August 13,
2016
Wally And The Lactation Room
Tags #man cave, #coffee, #trick, #lactation room
Transcript
Boss: Someone turned our lactation room into a personal man cave. Wally: That guy sounds awesome. Boss: The janitor found a recliner, a tv,and a coffee maker in there. So I asked myself who would put a coffee maker in a lactation room. Wally: I drink mine black.
Monday August 29,
2016
The Self Serving Consultant
Tags #consultant, #cruelty, #laziness, #work ethic, #business
Transcript
The Self-Serving Consultant. Dogbert: I recommend firing this guy so you have more money for me. I also recommend withholding his final check until he makes all of my PowerPoint slides for me. Man: This is messed up. Dogbert: Add some recommendations so I sound smart.
Sunday January 22,
2017
Tags #conversation, #analogy, #false equivalence, #frustration
Transcript
Narrator: The bad analogy guy. Dilbert: And that's why I want to rewrite that part of the software. Man: That's like closing the barn door after the horse gets out. Dilbert: No, it isn't anything like that. I just think the current software could bet better. Man: So it's like throwing away the baby with the bathwater. Dilbert: No, it is not like that even a little! Man: You sound exactly like Hitler. That can't be a coincidence. Dilbert: Nothing you say makes sense! Man: That's like saying the earth is flat.
Tuesday February 28,
2017
Wally's Political Views Make Others Uncomfortable
Tags #comparison, #gandhi, #Politics, #offense, #offensive, #sensitive, #politically correct, #political correctness
Transcript
Boss: Wally, your political opinions are making your co-workers uncomfortable. Wally: That is exactly what people said about Gandhi. Boss: You are nothing like Gandhi. Wally: Was he a little bald guy who didn't have a real job?