Harmful To Workers Comic Strips - Page 36
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421 Results for Harmful To Workers
View 351 - 360 results for harmful to workers comic strips. Discover the best "Harmful To Workers" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday May 18,
2019
Saving Babies
Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #reputation, #fire
Transcript
dilbert: I have been cleared of all allegations against me, but where do i go to get my reputation back? dogbert: i recommend running into a burning building to save a baby. dilbert: what if no buildings are on fire? dogbert: have you heard of matches?
Monday May 20,
2019
Boss Edits Dumb Parts
Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #edit
Transcript
the boss: i edited your draft to fix all of the dumb parts. it's in your email. the boss: when do you think you will publish it? dilbert: depends how long it takes me to reverse all of your edits. undo undo undo.
Tuesday May 21,
2019
Worthless Suggestions
Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm
Transcript
ted: i notice you didn't incorporate any of my suggestions in your final draft. ted: it's as if you are saying my ideas are worthless. dilbert: i would never say that. ted: so you're saying my ideas are good? dilbert: let's not reject ambiquity so quickly.
Wednesday May 22,
2019
Wally Has Best Excuse
Tags #boss, #business, #office, #office workers, #success
Transcript
wally: i was tempted to succeed this week, but i caught myself in time. wally: success would improve my odds of mating, and i don't think you want more people like me in this world. the boss: that is officially the best excuse for not working that i have ever heard. wally: shhh! don't compliment me in public!
Friday May 24,
2019
Counting Morons
Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #moron
Transcript
office worker, dilbert and the boss at conference table. office worker: dilbert and i disagree on how to fix the bug. dilbert: for context, one of us is a moron, and one of us is always right. the boss: i'm confused because there are three of us here. dilbert: i forgot one moron.
Saturday May 25,
2019
And Then Mark Said
Tags #anger, #business, #office, #office workers, #relationships
Transcript
tina: ...and then mark said... dilbert: stop talking about mark! dilbert is visually angry. dilbert: all you do is talk about mark! i am so sick of mark. please talk about anything but mark. dilbert is still visually angry. tina: someone told me you'd say that. dilbert: was his name -- MARK? dilbert angry.
Monday May 27,
2019
Wally's Reading Time
Tags #business, #meetings, #office, #office workers
Transcript
alice: wally, can we meet tomorrow at 8 am? wally: that's when i eat breakfast in the cafeteria. alice: how about 9 am? wally: that would bump into my bowel and reading time.
Tuesday May 28,
2019
Wally And His Priorities
Tags #business, #meetings, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm
Transcript
the boss: wally, can you attend a meeting at 10 am tomorrow? wally: sure. here's a list of my projects so you can tell me which one you want to fail while i'm wasting my time at your meeting. the boss: was there a chance one of them would succeed? wally: well played
Saturday June 01,
2019
Winners Never Quit
Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #inspirational quotes
Transcript
the boss: i'm not having much luck with my inspirational quotes, but i thought i would try one more time. the boss: "winners never quit, and quitters never win." dilbert: when ted quit, you gave him a raise to stay. the boss: these work better when you don't think about them.
Monday June 03,
2019
Touch Base With Carl
Tags #boss, #business, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers
Transcript
the boss: can you reach out to carl and touch base? dilbert: can you restate that using normal words? the boss: i could, but then it would feel as if i'm not managing you.