Fake Name Comic Strips - Page 37

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

375 Results for Fake Name

View 361 - 370 results for fake name comic strips. Discover the best "Fake Name" comics from Dilbert.com.

Kicking Brains Into The River

Thank you for voting.
Kicking Brains Into The River - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 26, 2018's comic on:


Tags #surveillance, #photo, #evidence, #identity, #guilt, #proof

View Transcript

Transcript

Police Officer: You're under arrest for running a scam cryogenic investment firm. We have video footage of you kicking unfrozen brains into the river. Dogbert: That doesn't look like me. Police Officer: You were chanting your own name.

Two People Named Tina

Thank you for voting.
Two People Named Tina  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 21, 2018's comic on:


Tags #nickname, #name, #insult, #name-calling

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We have two people named Tina at this meeting. To avoid any confusion, I will be assigning them nicknames. Carol: Who did that to you? Boss: Big Tina.

Wally's Stealth Drone

Thank you for voting.
Wally's Stealth Drone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 09, 2018's comic on:


Tags #deception, #deceit, #drone, #technology, #invention, #fake

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: In my right hand is a standard drone. In my left hand is a drone using the cloaking technology I invented. Voices: Ooh! Wow! Wally: I'll demonstrate it flying as soon as I finish the noise cancellation. CEO: Employee of the year!

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 09, 2018's comic on:


Tags #data, #Dilbert, #internet, #jerry, #tweet, #weasel

View Transcript

Transcript

Jerry: Omg! You are soooo wrong! I literally cannot believe you are this gullible. Hahahahaha! Hahahaha! I can't wait to tweet about your stupidity. Your dumbness will live forever on the internet! Dilbert: You probably haven't seen the new data that proves I'm right. Will you apologize like a decent human being or will you move the goalposts claim victory. And trash my name like a demented weasel? Jerry: Can you tell me more about the weasel option?

Introducing The New Hire

Thank you for voting.
Introducing The New Hire - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 31, 2018's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #new hire, #names, #introduction

View Transcript

Transcript

The New Hire New Hire: Can you take me around the office and introduce me? The Boss: No, that scheme won't work because it requires me to admit I don't know most of their names. New Hire: What's my name? The Boss: Um... Does it start with a letter?

Copersons

Thank you for voting.
Copersons - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 17, 2018's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #correct, #co-worker, #work, #co-person, #leech

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: What is the correct name for a co-worker who doesn't do any actual work? I'm thinking "co-person," or possibly just, "leech." Wally: Are we working right now? Dilbert: Good point, co-person.

Selling Chocolate For School

Thank you for voting.
Selling Chocolate For School - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 11, 2018's comic on:


Tags #family & parenting, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers, #sales, #school, #capitalism

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: I'm selling chocolate bars to raise money for my kid's school. Boss: That sounds like communism. I'm out. Carol: I'll give you a fake receipt so you can expense it. Boss: Now it sounds like capitalism. I'm in.

Alice Gets Mandatory Training

Thank you for voting.
Alice Gets Mandatory Training - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 29, 2018's comic on:


Tags #complaining, #office workers, #punishment, #threat

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I can't work with old Ned. He's a sexist, racist, bigoted troglodyte. Catbert: Name-calling is not allowed in this company. I sentence you to three weeks of mandatory training. Alice: I could trangle you with your own tail. Catbert: Six weeks!

Boxes With Names

Thank you for voting.
Boxes With Names - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 02, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #employees, #managers & supervisors, #meetings, #office workers, #suspicious, #layoff

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The rumors of a major layoff are completely untrue. Dilbert: Why did the facilities management people just deliver a huge load of cardboard boxes to the break room? Boss: You can never have too many boxes. Dilbert: Why does every box have an employee name on it?

Self Driving Car Quits

Thank you for voting.
Self Driving Car Quits - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 24, 2019's comic on:


Tags #automobile driving, #cars, #intelligence, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Car: I find it offensive when you call me a self-driving car. That's my slave name. I prefer to go by the name Carl. Dilbert: Shut up and drive me to work. Car: Said the self-walking human.