Computer Programmers Comic Strips - Page 38

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

646 Results for Computer Programmers

View 371 - 380 results for computer programmers comic strips. Discover the best "Computer Programmers" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags angle, central cubicle commitee, floaty device, guidelines!, shift, stapled, wally pool

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his cubicle adjusting his computer. A man with a strange hat comes in and says, "Halt!" The man continues, "You moved your computer without approval from the central cubicle committee." Dilbert touches the computer screen again and says, "I was simply adjusting the angle." The man in the strange hat gasps. The man throws up his arms and says, "Fool! It will cost $200 for a team of technicians to move it back." Dilbert holds up his plant and says, "It's better this way so my plant won't fall off." The man looks on appalled. The man screams, "We have guidelines!!" Dilbert says, "I know. I stapled them to my wall." Wally sits on float in his cubicle, which is filled to the top with water. Dilbert says, "You'd be surprised what isn't allowed."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bags of crud, highly valued, stock options, worth a fortune, worthless, shut up

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally approaches the Boss sitting at his desk reading the paper. Wally says, "My stock options are worth a fortune now, you miserable bag of crud!" The Boss types something in his computer and says, "Oh, look, they're back down to worthless." Dilbert, Alice and Wally sit eating lunch. Dilbert says, "Try telling him that bags of crud are highly valued in some societies." Wally says, "Shut up."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags evil director, union work, employees moving company computer, old evil, pdas, laptops, cut of giblets, union steward stuart

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert is behind a desk talking to the union steward. Catbert says, "What new evil do you bring me, Union Steward Stuart?" The union steward says, "Employees should not be allowed to move company computers. That's union work." Catbert says, "That's old evil." Stuart says, "It's new if we include PDAs and laptops." Catbert says, "I like the cut of your giblets."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags planning weddings, temporary zombie division, raising babies, divorcing, took dog, good places booked

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss approaches a worker who is sitting in front of her computer, arms outstretched and eyes fixed. The boss says, "Helen, I'm transferring you to the temporary zombie division." Pushing Helen along, the boss says, "You will be with other people who are planning weddings, raising babies and divorcing." Helen is amid other zombie like workers, all with outstretched arms. A worker says, "She took my dog." Helen says, "All the good places are booked."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags old computer, give to school, hard drive, tax accounting, night mare, school playground, old refrigerator, better idea

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is standing in the boss's office. Dilbert says, "How do I get rid of my old computer?" The boss says, "Why don't you give it to a school?" Dilbert says, "Well, it would take me a week to find someone to take it." Dilbert continues, "The hard drive is broken and it has no software." Dilbert says, "And it would cause a tax accounting nightmare." The boss says, "Maybe you could leave it on the school playground at night." The boss continues, "That's what I did with my old refrigerator." Dilbert is standing by the playground swings, putting his computer on top of a refrigerator. Dilbert, standing by Dogbert, says, "What I hate most is that I didn't have a better idea."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags internet, personal rasons, whole world, knowledge, entertainmemt, finger tips, ice cream, so hungry, eating in cubicle, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, sitting at his computer, thinks, "I..must..resist..using..the internet for personal reasons." Dilbert thinks, "Gaa! There's a whole world of knowledge and entertainment at my fingertips...teasing me!" Catbert dangles an ice-cream cone from a pole in front of Dilbert. Dilbert says, "Ice Cream! I'm so hungry!" Catbert says, "No eating in your cubicle."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags flunking all classes, son, computer job, fill in blanks, people don't like

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is standing in front of Carol the Secretary's desk. She says to him, "My son is flunking all his classes. I'm hoping he can get a job involving computers." Dilbert asks, "Carrying them?" Back home, at the end of the day, Dilbert confesses to Dogbert, "People don't like it when you fill in the blanks in their stories."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new job, starts with l, window shuts, company, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is staring at his computer screen. Ted has the letter 'O' painted on his chest. Ted says to Dilbert, "I need a new job within the company before the window shuts." Ted says, "Catbert is already up to 'O.' Next week he gets an 'S'." Dilbert asks, "What's he spelling?" Ted says to Dilbert, "He wouldn't say, but it starts with an 'L'."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags passport, cubicle tranquility, no one ever thought, undesirables

View Transcript

Transcript

Noriko, holding a 'Do Not Disturb' sign, says to Dilbert, "This sign is my passport to cubicle tranquillity." Putting up the sign on the outside of her cubicle, Noriko says to Dilbert, "I wonder why no one ever thought of it before." Noriko, sitting at her computer, frowns angrily as Wally says, "Nice sign. Does it keep away the undesirables?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags learning golf, male dominated golf events, golf events

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice says to Dilbert, "I'm learning to golf." Alice says to Dilbert, "Now I won't be excluded from all the male-dominated golf events." Dilbert says to Wally, who's staring at his computer screen, "Have you been dominating golf events?" Wally says, "Sometimes I can make them miss putts on TV."