Dogbert Comic Strips - Page 38

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Dogbert

View 371 - 380 results for dogbert comic strips. Discover the best "Dogbert" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, yesterday, price, no-rabies, warranty, plain, wag, pet, booth, business, stand

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits behind a box with a sign that says, "Pet me. $5.00." Dilbert says, "Hey! You charged me TEN dollars yesterday!" Dogbert explains, "Five dollars is just the base price. I charge extra for an extended no-rabies warranty and other add-ons." Dilbert says, "I'll take a 'plain.'" Dogbert asks, "Wag or no wag?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bob, Dogbert, milkshake, thick, spoon

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert and Bob the Dinosaur sit at the table. Dogbert asks, "Is your milkshake too thick, Bob?" Bob sucks on the straw. Dogbert says, "Here, try a spoon." Bob sucks on the spoon.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, japanese, offer, company, ceo, employees, laid off, accept, neener, Dogbert

View Transcript

Transcript

A man stands in front of Dilbert's desk and says, "The Japanese have made an offer to buy the company." The man continues, "As CEO you would make $68 million . . . But the employees would all be laid off." Back at home, Dilbert asks Dogbert, "If I accept, what will I say to the employees?" Dogbert replies, "How about 'neener neener?'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, reject, generous, company, hostile takeover, formidable, adversary, lawyers, clothes off

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to two attorneys, "I've decided to reject your generous offer to buy the company." Dilbert continues, "And if you try to make this a hostile takeover you will find me to be a formidable adversary." Dilbert arrives at home with his clothes ripped to shreads. Dilbert tells Dogbert, ". . . Then their lawyers chewed my clothes off."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, ceo, old, job, stressful, roses, afford

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I stepped down as CEO and took my old job back - it's less stressful." Dogbert replies, "Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses." Dilbert says, "Exactly." Dogbert says, "Too bad we can't afford any roses now."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, dog, help, single, Women, attractive, petable, cuter, Funny, impression, frothing, john sununu

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on the hassock. Dilbert says, "As my dog, I think you should be doing more to help me meet attractive single women during our walks." Dilbert continues, "Try to be cuter, and look more pet-able." Dilbert continues, "And it's not funny when you do your impression of a frothing mad dog every time somebody walks by." Dogbert replies, "That's my John Sununu impression."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, dating, problem, writing, down, qualities, girlfriend, ballerina, paw, cramping

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dogbert says, "We have to approach your dating problem logically." Dogbert continues, "We'll begin by writing down all of the qualities you want in a girlfriend." Much later, Dogbert is still writing and there are stacks of paper on the table. Dilbert says, ". . . And she must be a ballerina." Dogbert says, "My paw is cramping."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags coffee, Dilbert, Dogbert, drinking, dependent, chemicals, slow, work, monday, thursday

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I quit drinking coffee. I don't like to be dependent on chemicals." Dogbert asks, "How's it feel?" Dilbert replies, "I felt a little slow getting ready for work, but you have to expect that on a Monday." Dogbert says, "It's Thursday."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags exercise, Dilbert, Dogbert, joined, bowling, league, yikes, lower middle class, muscle, little arm

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert arrives at home carrying a bowling ball in a case. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I joined a bowling league." Dogbert's ears fly up in surprise and he says, "Yikes! We've become lower middle-class!" Dilbert says, "Don't be ridiculous. Bowling is good exercise. I'm doing it to build muscle tone." At the bowling alley, Dilbert sees three men who have one huge arm and one little arm. One of the men says, "Hey! 'Little Arm.'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, president, Dilbert, opening, supreme court, old, wandered, nominating, dog, loyal, george, somebody, message

View Transcript

Transcript

A presidential aide says to the President, "Mister President, there's another opening on the Supreme Court. One of the old guys wandered away." The aide continues, "I recommend nominating a dog this time. They tend to be loyal and everybody likes them." Dilbert hands Dogbert the phone and says, "It's for you . . . George somebody." Dogbert says, "Take a message."