Forty Hours Training Comic Strips - Page 38

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

378 Results for Forty Hours Training

View 371 - 378 results for forty hours training comic strips. Discover the best "Forty Hours Training" comics from Dilbert.com.

Tina Likes To Hum

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Tina Likes To Hum - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoy, #business, #humming

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: would you please stop humming? it's making me crazy. Tina: i can't focus unless i hum. dilbert: but i can't focus when you do hum. i'm going to talk to your boss. tina: i'm going to talk to your boss! hum, hum, hum. dilbert: gaaa!!! i can't work when she hums. tina: humming helps me work better. boss: i rule in favor of the hummer and i sentence dilbert to take sensitivity training class to be less of a jerk. dilbert: i hate you. tina: hum, hum, hum.

Conference Call

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Conference Call - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #business, #conference call, #meeting, #useful, #don't care

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: how did your conference call go? dilbert: normal. it took us twenty minutes to get everyone connected, followed by forty minutes of garbled speech that no one understood. the meeting ended when everyone got tired of pretending something useful was happening. wally: i didn't really care.

Cross Training

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Cross Training - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #co-workers, #business, #cross train, #fire, #job, #dumb, #manager

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: our pointy-haired boss told me to ask you to cross-train me on your job junctions. ted: that sounds exactly like he plans to fire me as soon as you can do my job. dilbert: in my defense, he assured me you would be too dumb to realize that.

No Interruptions At Home

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
No Interruptions At Home - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #business, #working, #home, #workday, #productivity, #anger, #annoying, #bowel, #problems

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert sitting on couch with dogbert: i like working from home. i can do eight hours of work in one hour because no one is interrupting me. dogbert yelling: i'm trying to work here! dilbert: did i tell you about my bowel problems? dogbert: go away!

Sarcastic About Safety

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Sarcastic About Safety  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #education, #office workers, #safety, #sarcasm, #training

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I hear you were being sarcastic about safety. Obviously, you don't take safety seriously, so I have to send you to a safety re-education camp for a week. Dilbert: That will totally fix this problem. Boss: You just bought yourself an extra week.

Dilbert Not On Mute

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Not On Mute - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #meetings, #video conference, #zoom, #time-wasting, #fool, #mute

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert on a video conference call and voices coming from laptop" We've been going for two hours, so let's wrap up... i have a new topic... dilbert: Gaaa!!! why is there always on time-wasting fool on every zoom call??? why? why? voice from laptop: dilbert, you're not on mute. dilbert: oh. did you hear my tv? i'll turn it down.

Recurring Charges

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Recurring Charges - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #cancel, #online, #charges, #information, #automated phone system, #contact, #website, #microphone

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert at home: i'm going to try to cancel some recurring online charges today. wish me luck. dogbert: what resistance are you expecting? dilbert: obviously, they hide their contact information, so i allocated two hours to find the right phone number. it should take about an hour to navigate their automated phone system that will keep sending me to the wrong place. if i reach a human, he'll try to divert me to their website to cancel, which i already know won't work because... ...i won't be able to find my account in their system for reasons no one will ever be able to explain. and of course, their phone support person will be using a headset microphone that garbles his already mumbled words. dogbert: but if you stick with it, you will eventually succeed? dilbert: i don't know were you got that idea.

Deep Fake Zoom

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Deep Fake Zoom - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #video conference, #zoom, #call, #deep fake, #program, #generic, #employee, #work, #sarcasm, #cell phone, #laptop

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert looking at phone on couch at home. dogbert: i thought you said you had a zoom call that would last for hours today. dilbert: i built a "deep fake" version of myself to take zoom calls and say generic employee stuff. next slide is boss in from of laptop on video call. boss: dilbert, do you have anything to add? dilbert: i don't know if i'm working hard or hardly working. har-har!