Wrong Order Comic Strips - Page 38

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456 Results for Wrong Order

View 371 - 380 results for wrong order comic strips. Discover the best "Wrong Order" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dilbert Becomes Quasimodo

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Dilbert Becomes Quasimodo - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags hunchback, posture, slouch, attitude, psychology

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Dilbert: This job is turning me into Quasimodo. Tina: Is it mostly a posture thing, or do you have some of the Quasi's attitude as well? Dilbert; What's wrong with my posture? Tina: I could ask you what's wrong with his attitude.

Boss Uses His Gut

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Boss Uses His Gut - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags gut, instinct, decision, deciding, logic, stomach, mouth, guest artist, joel friday

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Boss: Your analysis does not conform to my preconceived notions. So my gut instinct is telling me that you are wrong. Dilbert: When your gut talks to you, what does it use for a mouth?

Ted Has A Ravine Option

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Ted Has A Ravine Option - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cruelty, empathy, hr, human resources, mean, guest artist, brenna thummler, business

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Catbert: Evil Director Of Human Resources. Ted: Dilbert said he wants me to drive into a ravine. Catbert: I want that too. I didn't realize it was an option. Ted: Perhaps I have come tot he wrong place. Catbert: I hear good things about the ravine.

Be Careful With Anti Encryption Software

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Be Careful With Anti Encryption Software - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags national security, privacy, technology, encryption, security, human error, secrets

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Dilbert: Here's the flash drive with our anti-encryption software. Don't let it get into the wrong hands or it will eliminate all privacy on Earth. Do you understand? Boss: Blah, blah, software.

The Entitled Employee

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The Entitled Employee - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags millennials, entitlement, entitiled, lazy, work ethic

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The Entitled Employee. Dilbert: Did you finish your assignment for the project? Coworker: No, I was tired, and it looked hard. I assume someone does the hard stuff for me. Am I wrong? Dilbert: I need to have a word with your parents.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags internet, viral video, awkward, interaction, insult, cell phone, technology

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Boss: Did you see the viral video of the kitten riding the zebra? Dilbert: I know where this is heading and I don't like it. You're going to spend the next ten minutes looking for that video on your phone while we wait. Boss: It will only take a second. Dilbert: And so it begins. Boss: Here it is. No, wait. Dang. Wrong one. Okay, here it is. Oops, no, wrong one. Narrator: Ten minutes later. Boss: What do you think? Dilbert: I can't see it because you keep moving. Boss: I would let you hold it, but I don't want your germs on my phone. Dilbert: There are a lot of unsatisfying parts to this interaction. Wally: Now my coffee is cold.

Boss Can't Decide Who To Vote For

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Boss Can't Decide Who To Vote For - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags election, voting, choice, choosing, decision, indecision, judgement

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Boss: I can't decide who to vote for in this election. Alice: Make your voting decision the same way you make your work decisions. Boss: Common sense and gut instinct? Alice: We just call it "wrong."

Dinner With A Social Justice Warrior

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Dinner With A Social Justice Warrior - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags sjw, internet, personality, political correctness, politically correct, flirting, insult, masculinity, technology, psychology

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Man: I'm a social justice warrior. That means I'm on our side. Do you want to go to dinner with me? Alice: No, thanks. I'm into men. Man: I am a man. Alice: Don't make me turn around and prove you wrong.

Phone Better Than Human

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 Phone Better Than Human  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technology, distraction, human, conversation

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Alan: Everything went wrong for me this week. I have problems... all kinds of problems. Dilbert: For the zillionth time in a row, my phone is more fun than talking to a human.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags time, time management

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Dilbert: You asked for a breakdown of what I did this month. I wasted 25 percent of my time in useless meetings. I spent 33 percent of my time listening to co-workers complain about other co-workers. I used 11 percent to resend files I already sent. 14 percent went to dealing with a rumor you started by accident. 16 percent went toward working on the wrong things because you communicate poorly. Boss: What did you do with the 1 percent that was left? Dilbert: You just experienced it.