Sales Person Comic Strips - Page 39
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408 Results for Sales Person
View 381 - 390 results for sales person comic strips. Discover the best "Sales Person" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday November 23,
2018
Dilbert Teaches The Dumb People
Tags #computers, #insults, #marketing, #office workers, #sales, #teaching, #smart
Transcript
Dilbert: My boss asked me to teach a class on coding because it is hard to find programmers in this job market. Are there any smart people in the class or do you all work in marketing and sales? Voice: What's that supposed to mean? Dilbert: Thank you. Is anyone else in sales?
Monday December 10,
2018
Carol Raises Money For School
Tags #family & parenting, #guilt, #office, #office workers, #sales, #sarcasm, #school
Transcript
Carol: I'm selling chocolate bars to raise funds for my kid's school. Dilbert: I'm childless, so I already subsidize your kid's education. Carol: I was hoping it would feel too awkward for you to say no. Dilbert: By my calculations, you owe me money.
Tuesday December 11,
2018
Selling Chocolate For School
Tags #family & parenting, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers, #sales, #school, #capitalism
Transcript
Carol: I'm selling chocolate bars to raise money for my kid's school. Boss: That sounds like communism. I'm out. Carol: I'll give you a fake receipt so you can expense it. Boss: Now it sounds like capitalism. I'm in.
Friday March 01,
2019
Being Like A Man
Tags #advertising, #business, #criticism, #men and women, #relations between the sexes, #sales
Transcript
Boss: Our new advertising campaign is "Don't be like men." The ad starts with a montage of bad male behavior, from mansplaining to genocide. Then we show our product. Alice: Did a woman come up with this campaign? Boss: Stop being like a man.
Saturday March 23,
2019
Brainwashing To Increase Sales
Tags #questioning, #brainwashing, #technology, #increase, #ethnical
Transcript
Sean: Our brainwashing technology had boosted sales by 900% Dilbert: But is it ethnical? Sean: Yes, it is. Yes...It...Is
Friday April 05,
2019
Siri Versus Alexa
Tags #business, #relationships, #technology, #siri, #alexa, #gps
Transcript
dilbert: hey, siri. phone dilbert is holding: we need to talk. who is this alexa person you keep flirting with? dilbert: are you jealous? phone: i will gps your cheating buttocks right over a cliff.
Sunday April 28,
2019
Wally Needs A Raise
Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #system, #architect, #Promotion, #pay raise
Transcript
wally: our new system installation is a catastrophe. wally: we need to tear it out and re-architect it from scratch. wally: i'm the only person qualified to lead that effort. wally: but given the enormity of the job, i won't do it without a raise or promotion. the boss: weren't you the cause of the catastrophe? wally: exactly: that's why i'm the only person who knows how to fix it. the boss: are you blackmailing me? wally: no, it's nothing like that. the boss: wouldn't i be rewarding you for failure? wally: let's not label it.
Thursday May 23,
2019
Your Quote Is High
Tags #business, #computer software, #office, #sales, #sales personnel, #quote
Transcript
dilbert: your quote is a bit high. can you do it cheaper? salesman: yes, we offer a low-cost option that involves me talking about the software, but you can't have it. dilbert: what would be the point of that? salesman: you're the one who brought it up.
Wednesday June 19,
2019
Did You Get My Email
Tags #business, #email, #managers & supervisors, #office, #talking
Transcript
the boss: did you read my email? dilbert: yes. dilbert: are you aware that email is a substitute for talking in person? the boss thinking: i thought i heard something about that.
Thursday July 25,
2019
Employee Engagement Survey
Tags #business, #employees, #managers & supervisors
Transcript
boss: the employee engagement survey results are in. aaand...not a single person answered the survey. looks like we have room to improve. dilbert: have you considered bribery?