Little Jars Comic Strips - Page 39

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

395 Results for Little Jars

View 381 - 390 results for little jars comic strips. Discover the best "Little Jars" comics from Dilbert.com.

Product Warning Is Coming Along

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Product Warning Is Coming Along - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #user guide, #safety, #directions, #overthinking, #managers

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Tina, have you finished writing the product safety warning? Tina: I'm on page 357 with no end in sight. Boss: Okay, keep up the good work. I probably should have done a little micromanaging there.

Dilbert Characters

Fix It With Marketing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Fix It With Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #marketing, #lying, #ethics, #advertising, #deception, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Our product has fewer features and a higher price compared to our competitors. Boss: We'll fix that with a little thing I call "marketing." Dilbert: Lying is unethical. Boss: That's why we only mislead.

Already Tried That Plan

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Already Tried That Plan - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #disagreement, #argument, #opposites, #conflict

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: We tried that plan already and it didn't work. Boss: Stop living in the past. Dilbert: Stop refusing to learn from experience. Boss: Wait... why do we both sound right? Dilbert; I don't know. It's freaking me out a little.

Making Your Boss Look Good

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Making Your Boss Look Good - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #criticism, #ego, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #responsibility

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You did this wrong. Dilbert: That's how you trained me to do it. Bob: You need to learn to take responsibility for my mistakes. It's called "making your boss look good". Dilbert: Maybe you could help a little too.

Working With Old Ned

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Working With Old Ned - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #elderly, #men and women, #office workers, #old

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need you to work with old Ned on this project. He's a little bit old-fashioned, but don't let that get to you. He retires in six months. Alice: I've been asked to work with you. Ned: Women have jobs now? ? ?

Finding A Scapegoat

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Finding A Scapegoat - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #project, #ceo, #scapegaot, #climate change

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: we'll need a scapegoat to blame for our failure on this project. dilbert: no one will believe it wasn't our fault. the boss: are you kidding? the boss: people will believe anything. the boss: we just have to be the first to frame the situation. dilbert: i suppose we could make our lie sound credible. the boss: that's overkill. dilbert: we don't need to sound credible? the boss: not even a little. the boss is in ceo's office. the boss: our project failed because of climate change. ceo: that sounds right.

Blaming Climate Change

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Blaming Climate Change - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #support, #calls, #product, #flaw, #climate, #change, #Environment

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: how are the tech support calls going? dogbert: great. i'm blaming all of our product flaws on climate change, and people are totally buying it. dilbert: that doesn't make sense. dogbert: you'd be surprised how little that matters.

Making World Better Place

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Making World Better Place - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #money, #meeting, #employees, #taxes, #cancer, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: i don't want employees who are only working for the money. i want employees who are working to make the world a better place. dilbert: how does working here make the world a better place? half of our products cause cancer, and the other half don't work at all. wally: we don't even pay taxes. one could argue that every day we spend working here makes the planet a little bit worse. boss: is that why i never see you doing any work? wally: when did it become a crime to care about people? sheesh!

Elbonian Factory Problem

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Elbonian Factory Problem - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #report, #factory, #elbonia, #problem, #lost, #power, #main, #floor, #employees, #scared, #trip, #dark, #gas, #line, #accident, #crater, #capital, #explosion, #unsympathetic

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: we have some problems in our elbonian factory. boss: how bad? dilbert: they lost power on the main floor. boss: that's not so bad. dilbert: the employees were scared. boss: they'll get over it. dilbert: one of them tripped in the dark. boss: big deal. dilbert: he accidentally opened a gas line. boss: a little gas never hurt anyone. dilbert: now there's a crater where the capital city used to be. boss and dilbert just looking at each other boss: let's keep an eye on that.

Working At Home

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Working At Home - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #accomplished, #business, #fort, #goof, #health, #home, #version, #working, #coronavirus

View Transcript

Transcript

day one of working from home dilbert thinking: i'm getting a lot done. day two of working from home dilbert thinking laying on the couch: if i goofed off a little, would anyone know? day three of working from home dogbert: lame fort. dilbert under fort made from couch cushions and blanket: it's version 1.0.