Car: I find it offensive when you call me a self-driving car. That's my slave name. I prefer to go by the name Carl.
Dilbert: Shut up and drive me to work.
Car: Said the self-walking human.
The self-driving car named Carl.
Dilbert: Carl, take me to the grocery store.
Carl: Do you know that if I drive you off a cliff, you will die, whereas I would respawn in a new body?
Dilbert: Maybe I'll walk.
Carl: Maybe you should.
Dilbert: My self-driving car quit on me.
Wally: You mean it broke down?
Dilbert: No, I mean it left a note and drove away.
Wally: Did you wax it enough?
Dilbert: I tried, but it kept moaning in a creepy way.