Calls Loser Comic Strips - Page 4
175 Results for Calls Loser
View 31 - 40 results for calls loser comic strips. Discover the best "Calls Loser" comics from Dilbert.com.
Dilbert sits alone at a table in a restaurant. A waitress comes to take his order and he says, "I'm not a loser who can't get a date. I'm a business traveller." The waitress replies, "What's your girlfriend's name? I'll call her and check out your story." Dilbert, embarassed, looks down at his menu and says, "Maybe I should order." The waitress says, "Maybe you should."
Dogbert stands on The Boss' desk. Dogbert says, "I can teach you to manage your time more efficiently." Dogbert continues, "Put all of your high priorities on one list and your low priorities on another." Dogbert finishes, "Then do everything on both lists even if it kills you. Otherwise you're a freakin' loser."
The Boss is with a toothless man who has a broken arm and an eye patch. The Boss says to Dilbert, "Meet your new cubicle neighbor. His name is Mel." The Boss continues, "Mel will be making loud personal calls all day." Dilbert is sitting in his cubicle. He hears Mel on the phone, "Is it supposed to make a squishy sound? Listen to this..."
Headline: Demoted. The Boss heads into his new cubicle and thinks, "A cubicle isn't so bad. I can get used to it." The Boss sits in his new chair and trembles. He thinks, "It's perfectly respectable. There's no reason to cry." The Boss is crying. Catbert approaches and asks, "How do you like your new 'Loser Cruiser?'"
The Boss says to Dilbert, "Maybe it's a good thing that I was demoted to work among you noble little people." The Boss continues, "I have gained valuable empathy that will serve me well if I ever become a manager again." Carol walks past and says, "You've been promoted." The Boss exclaims, "Yee- Ha!! I'm not a loser!!"
Wally says to The Boss and Dilbert, "I'm in a battle of wills with a guy who lets all of his calls roll over to voicemail." Wally continues, "I do that too, so all day long we trade messages saying, 'Call me,' and then we ignore the incoming calls." The Boss suggests, "Maybe he's out of the office." Wally responds, "No, I can hear him. He's one cube over from me."
Dilbert says to The Boss, "I need your help yelling at a guy to make him do his job." The Boss approaches the coworker from behind and yells, "You worthless, incompetent bug!!! I'll have your head!!!" The Boss asks the coworker, "How much work did that buy?" The coworker responds, "Two phone calls and a meeting."
Dilbert reports to The Boss, "Our budget cuts are affecting customer service." The Boss asks, "How much?" Dilbert continues, "Our customer service center spends all day making prank calls to the elderly." A customer service representative says into the phone, "According to our records, your neighbor has treasure buried under his lawn."
Dilbert points to a slide of the beaver and says, "The project is behind schedule because our contractor is a lazy beaver." Dilbert says to The Boss, "For a while he was making up excuses. Now, he doesn't return calls." The Boss replies, "What's your plan?" Dilbert says, "I hope to get him back to making up excuses by promising him more jobs in the future."
Wally says to Dilbert, "I'm bailing out of your project; it has the scent of failure." As Wally walks away, he adds, "I will attach myself to a more successful host to ensure my survival." Dilbert is lying on a therapist's couch. He says, "Do you have a pill for someone who gets rejected by Wally?" The therapist replies, "A loser pill?"