Deliver Bad News Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

764 Results for Deliver Bad News

View 31 - 40 results for deliver bad news comic strips. Discover the best "Deliver Bad News" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 13, 2005's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

Do you have the list of invitees for the debriefing meeting? "Here." "I like to blame people who won't be in the room." "Bad news for you: You're not on the list."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 11, 2010's comic on:


Tags #bad news, #awkward, #funny face

View Transcript

Transcript

Man says, "A salesman borrowed the demo unit that you flew across the country to see." Man says, "Can I show you something totally irrelevant so this doesn't feel so awkward?" Dilbert says, "Give me a minute to get out of the splatter zone."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 27, 2010's comic on:


Tags #e-mail, #urgent, #sitting, #desk, #computer, #flames, #eclipse, #cell phone, #witless protection program, #hoax, #duped, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "The urgent e-mail you forwarded to the entire company is a hoax." Dilbert says, "People don't really burst into flames if they use their cell phones during an eclipse." Dilbert says, "And more bad news: The witless protection program isn't a real thing."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 19, 2009's comic on:


Tags #angry, #pointing, #flaws, #yelling, #screaming

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "You'd actually be attractive if you didn't have crazy eyes." Woman says, "What?" Dilbert says, "The eyes are the mirror of the soul. Your soul appears to be mostly spiders and bad news." Dilbert says, "Any minute now?" Woman says, "You cause the rain!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 27, 2008's comic on:


Tags #agreement, #bad news, #euphoric feeling, #harsh landing, #illusion of progress, #lasts a minute, #momentary sweetness, #reacts, #spoiler, #planning meeting

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Okay, we have a good plan forward. This meeting is adjourned. Oooh!!!" "AaaaH!!!" Asok: What is that?"AAAH!! Dilbert: She's tasting the sweet nectar of the illusion in progress. It's that euphoric feeling you get between the time you make a plan and the time some moron thwarts it. AAAH!!! It can last anywhere from less than a minute to as much as a minute. Wally: Ted won't meet with us because someone told him that you told someone else he was an obstacle. Alice: GRRRRR!!! Dilbert: The landing is harsh."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 02, 2004's comic on:


Tags #stock investing, #valuable data, #project on schedule, #refines data, #ceo, #accountants, #nanotaechnology, #discount brokerage, #investors, #secret society, #donald trumps

View Transcript

Transcript

dogcart explains stock investing Dogbert: pay attention. First, employees provide data. Th boss: is your project on schedule? Wally: I didn't know I had a project. A Manager refines the data. The boss: we're on schedule. The CEO gives visibility to analysts. CEO: no problems whatsoever. Accountants publish bad news in footage notes using a combination of nanotechnology and gibberish. Accountant: still too obvious. -Discount brokerage firms tell you that you're smart- Use you own ideas! Investors do their own research Buy it because I did. Thank you unbiased stranger! A secret society of Donald Trump look alike end up with all your money trumps: you're fired. you are!

Dogbert Disposes Bodies

Thank you for voting.
Dogbert Disposes Bodies - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 30, 2015's comic on:


Tags #dolphin, #exotic pets, #hit man, #murder, #murder for hire, #russian military, #killed clown, #dead bodies, #disposal, #expert

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I bought a Russian military dolphin for a pet and it killed a party clown at my daughter's pool party. I need you to dispose of the body. Dogbert: The good news is that I'm an expert at getting rid of dead bodies. CEO: What's the bad news? Dogbert: Your dolphin hired me to kill you.

The Boss's Feng Shui And Aura

Thank you for voting.
The Boss's Feng Shui And Aura - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 02, 2016's comic on:


Tags #horoscope, #Astrology, #prediction, #fortune, #nonsense

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: Ooh. Bad news on your horoscope today. Your moon is intersecting with the feng shui of your aura. Boss: How long do I have? Carol: You'll be dead by noon. Boss: I meant until my next meeting.

Wally Is A Maverick

Thank you for voting.
Wally Is A Maverick - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 21, 2017's comic on:


Tags #health, #standing desks, #standing, #sitting, #laziness

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I like to think of myself as a maverick. Let the trendy people brag about their standing desks. I haven't stood in a week. Dilbert: I have some bad news about your health risks. Wally: Should I sit down to hear it?

Elbonian Ninjas

Thank you for voting.
Elbonian Ninjas - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 18, 2018's comic on:


Tags #controversy, #offense, #offensive, #threat, #murder, #ninja, #optimism

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The sales video you made for our Elbonian market is causing a public relations crisis. Their government has ordered Elbonian ninjas to kill you in your sleep. Dilbert: In my sleep? The best way to die! Boss: Stop confusing my bad news with your good news.