Driver For Car Pool Comic Strips - Page 4

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177 Results for Driver For Car Pool

View 31 - 40 results for driver for car pool comic strips. Discover the best "Driver For Car Pool" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 21, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #marriage counselor, #love, #car, #later, #personality, #mildew, #spraying, #dizzy

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A woman sits next to her husband. She says, "I fell in love with him because he had a great car . . ." The woman continues, "It wasn't until later that I realized he has the personality of mildew." Dogbert sits in a chair holding a pen and a pad of paper. Dogbert asks, "Have you tried spraying him with Lysol?" The woman replies, "Yeah, it only makes him dizzy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 02, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #volunteers, #cell phone, #ratbert, #car salespeople

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Dilbert sits outside the dome and types on a laptop, "With oxygen and food nearly depleted, the Bioworld volunteers become philosophical." Dogbert and Ratbert communicate using cellular phones. Ratbert says, "Some of the volunteers think that because they're car salespeople you don't value their lives . . ." Dogbert says, "If that were true, how can you explain that we put you in there too?" Ratbert says, "That's what I said, but it didn't seem to cheer them up."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 03, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #bioworld, #experiement, #Food, #air, #gone, #sadistic, #car, #salespeople, #boss, #saturn

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Man: Please... End the bio world experiment. We're out of food. Air is almost gone. We pray there was no sadistic intent when you chose only car salespeople for the experiment... Please... At least let some air in... Dogbert: Gee, I really want to help. I'll go try to convince my boss to see it your way. Man: Hey! I'm a "saturn" dealer- I'm different!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 14, 1995's comic on:


Tags #dogbert venture capitalist, #invest 5 million, #agree, #standard conditions, #chairman of board, #mow lawn, #wash car, #touch bargainer, #multimedia developers, #gardening needs

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Dogbert sits at his desk and a businessman sits across from him. Reading from a document, Dogbert says, "I'll invest up to five million dollars if you'll agree to some standard conditions." Dogbert continues, "I will be chairman of the board and own 99% of the company. You will work for free and wash my car twice a week." The businessman asks, "Can I mow your lawn instead of washing your car?" Dogbert answers, "You're a tough bargainer, but I prefer multimedia developers for my gardening needs."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 03, 1995's comic on:


Tags #hired as temp, #ratbert, #cardboard box, #main hallway, #regular employees, #status, #security gurad, #crud behind refrigerator, #company car

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Dilbert says to Ratbert, "Congratulations on getting hired as a temp, Ratbert." Ratbert answers, "Where do I start?!" Dilbert tells him, "Your office is this cardboard box in the main hallway. The regular employees will not make eye contact or ask your name." Dilbert continues, "Your status is roughly between the security guard and the crud behind the refrigerator." Ratbert replies, "Do I get a company car?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 23, 1995's comic on:


Tags #found software, #performance evaluations, #same company, #fortune cookies, #buy new car, #use pc

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The Boss approaches Wally and Dilbert. The Boss says, "I found software that helps managers write performance evaluations!" Dilbert and Wally both say, "Uh-oh." The Boss continues, "It's made by the same company that makes fortune cookies for Canada!" Wally says, "That makes me feel better." The caption says, "Next Day." The Boss offers Wally and Dilbert small strips of paper. Dilbert says, "I didn't think you knew how to use a PC." The Boss replies, "My secretary wrote these." Wally reads a strip aloud, "Don't by a new car."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 31, 1995's comic on:


Tags #focus core bsuiness, #core business change, #misdirected failure, #car gets flat, #rotate tires, #drive home

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Wally says to the Boss, "I don't understand how the new reorganization will help us 'focus on our core business.'" Wally continues, "Did our core business change? Or are you saying that EVERY reorg prior to this was a misdirected failure?" The Boss asks hypothetically, "Wally, when a car gets a flat tire, what do you do?" Wally answers, "Well, if I'm you, I rotate the tires and drive home."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 08, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #security system, #pool, #catapult, #invention, #fate

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Dilbert taps on the doorstep with a spade. He tells Dogbert, "My new security system is now installed." Dogbert asks, "How's it work?" Dilbert explains, "I buried a giant spring under the welcome mat to catapult any undesirables into the Wilsey's pool three blocks from here." Dilbert continues, "You just tap that little button on the floor there . . ." The caption says, "Time stands still as Dogbert ponders the gift that fate has given him." Dogbert stares at the launch button while Dilbert stands on the welcome mat. Dogbert reaches for the button and says, "I'm pretty sure the look on his face will be worth whatever minor guilt I feel over this."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 17, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #bird, #alive, #car, #resist, #old, #smoe, #blob, #little, #brain

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Dilbert drives his car. He says, "Uh-oh, what's that lying in the road up there?" Dilbert says, "It looks like a squished animal, or maybe a bird." Dogbert sits in the passenger's seat. Dilbert continues, "I think it moved . . . Maybe it's still alive." Dogbert turns his head and says, "I don't want to look . . . It could be disgusting." Dilbert turns his head back and says, ". . . Can't resist. I have to look anyway." Dilbert screams and says, "It's disgusting!!" Dilbert says, "Oh, wait . . . It's just an old shoe." Dilbert cries, "What's that little blob up ahead?!" Dogbert replies, "I think it's your brain."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 13, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #man, #used car, #salesman, #car, #came, #negotiation

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Dogbert says to a customer, "I can let you have this one for five thousand." The man says, "Three thousand." Dogbert replies, "No, but I could sell THAT car for four thousand." The man says, "Thirty-five hundred." Dogbert replies, "Sold." The man says as he drives away in the car, "I guess you don't get a lot of negotiators like me." Dogbert says, "It's the first time anybody bought the car they came here in."