Albanian Court Comic Strips - Page 4
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42 Results for Albanian Court
View 31 - 40 results for albanian court comic strips. Discover the best "Albanian Court" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday October 03,
2008
Tags #albanian makeover, #bald and chinless, #hat makes taller, #career helper, #minute to drink in, #vp of finance
Transcript
Wally says, "I got an Elbonian makeover. Now no one can tell I'm bald and chinless." Wally says, "The hat even makes me look taller. I think this will help my career." Wally says, "Take a minute to drink this in." An Elbonian says, "I just found my new VP of finance!"
Tuesday October 18,
2011
Tags #copyright & trademark, #inventions, #competitor suing, #albanian court, #design trademark, #block manufacturing, #shaped like rectangle, #design shapes, #irregular mole
Transcript
Man: Our competitor is suing us in an Elbonian court for some sort of design trademark violation. They're trying to block us from manufacturing anything shaped like a rectangle. Boss: What design shapes are available? Man: Only one, assuming "irregular mole" is a shape.
Friday October 19,
2012
Tags #business ethics, #consumer protection, #court ordered, #good defense, #internal emails, #known to be dangerous
Transcript
Lawyer: The court ordered us to turn over all of our internal emails. Have you ever mentioned in email that our products are known to be dangerous but we don't care? CEO: I don't even know what products we make. Lawyer: That's a good defense. We might need that.
Tuesday February 26,
2013
Tags #mathematics, #patents, #patent infreingement, #jury duty, #award
Transcript
Lawyer: A small company is suing us for patent infringement. We'll be fine unless the court somehow finds twelve citizens who aren't smart enough to get out of jury duty yet are inexplicably able to do math. Juror: We recommend an award of whatever the square root of 22 over zero is.
Friday February 07,
2014
Tags #discrimination, #gays, #laws, #india, #crime, #born gay, #intern, #officially gay, #gay stuff to do
Transcript
Dogbert: The Supreme Court of India recently voted to uphold a law making it a crime to be born gay.* To commemorate that hopelessly ignorant decision, Asok the intern is now officially gay. Okay, we're done here. Asok: Good, because I have a lot of gay stuff to do. *essentially
Saturday February 08,
2014
Tags #discrimination, #gays, #ignorance (knowledge), #india, #supreme court, #nuclear arsenal, #scientific knowledge, #illegal to be gay, #nuke, #taj mahal, #so gay
Transcript
Asok: I can never return to India because the Supreme Court made it illegal to be gay there. Does it worry you that they have a nuclear arsenal and the scientific knowledge of inebriated astrologists? Dilbet: They might nuke the Taj Mahal. Asok: I know! That place is so gay, right?
Monday August 24,
2015
Robots Read News Of Supreme Court Ruling
Tags #supreme court, #partisan politics, #engineers, #morals, #legislation, #conservatism, #liberal, #guilt, #innocence
Transcript
Robots Read News. Robot: The Supreme Court ruled that engineers cannot be found guilty of murder. Lawyers argued that any good engineer knows how to get away with murder, so getting caught is proof of innocence. The ruling was unanimous because no one could figure out which side was the liberal one.
Saturday January 20,
2018
Ceo Gives Shoulder Rubs
Tags #flirting, #implementation, #new rules, #shoulder rub, #sock collar, #team spirit
Transcript
CEO: Hey, Alice. Let me give you a shoulder rub in the name of team spirit. CEO: AAAAGH!!! Alice: click CEO: I hate having a court - ordered shock collar. The boss: I don't see a...oh.
Tuesday March 20,
2018
Temperature Court
Tags #thermostat, #temperature, #hot, #cold, #office, #office workers, #disagreement
Transcript
Dogbert: Welcome to temperature court. One of you has frozen appendages and one of you is burning up. But only one temperature can rule the office. I rule that the thermostat must be set at exactly 72 degrees. Dilbert: Noooo!!! Alice: Shoot me!
Tuesday January 07,
2020
Court Of Stupidity
Tags #business, #legal, #court, #lawyer, #stupidity, #appeal, #bailiff
Transcript
dilbert at table with dogbert: my boss is accusing me o not knowing what he was thinking. i need you to be my lawyer and handle my appeal to the court of stupidity. court of stupidity the court rules in favor of the bailiff.