Classic Excuses Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

66 Results for Classic Excuses

View 31 - 40 results for classic excuses comic strips. Discover the best "Classic Excuses" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #doubting, #challenge, #bible, #god, #scare, #planned, #Religion

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Wally, I need you to work with a greater sense of urgency." Wally says, "The Bible says, "Good things come to those who wait." Wally says, "SO it's basically you against God. Let me know when you two get it sorted out." Dilbert says, "Really? There was thunder when he doubted you?" Wally says, "I synchronize my excuses to weather forecasts."

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #laziness, #meetings, #telephones, #returned calls, #tragus, #phone, #research on excuses, #useless, #big difference

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker says, "Why haven't you returned my calls?" Wally says, "I tried, but when I put the phone to my ear, it pressed my tragus over my ear hole and I couldn't hear a thing." Coworker says, "Do you do research on your excuses before meetings?" Wally says, "I'm not lazy, I'm useless. There's a big difference."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #electronic mail, #mobile (cell) phones, #instant message, #emailed, #texted, #personal phone, #called, #inperson, #negate, #ignore, #push away, #no answer, #excuses

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: You never answered my IM. Alice: You should have emailed me. Dilbert: I did. You didn't answer my email. Alice: If it was so important, you should have texted me. Dilbert: You didn't answer my texts. Alice; You have to text my personal phone. Dilbert: You didn't answer those texts either. Alice: Had it been important, you would have called me. Dilbert: I did. You didn't answer your phone and you don't return calls. So here I am. Alice: It's premature to get your hopes up.

Carol Says Dilbert Had A Vacuuming Accident

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Carol Says Dilbert Had A Vacuuming Accident - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #excuses, #lying, #tardiness, #traffic, #vacuum, #freak accident, #vacuuming naked, #bad traffic

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: Dilbert called to say he'd be late for your meeting. He said something about having a freak accident while vacuuming naked. Dilbert: Did you tell him traffic was bad? Carol: More or less.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #reasoning, #excuse, #leadership, #Promotion, #promote

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I can't promote you because you didn't have an impact on anything important. Dilbert: How can I have an impact on important things when you put me on unimportant projects? Boss: That sounds like an excuse. Dilbert: What's the difference between an excuse and a great reason? Boss: It depends who says it. Leaders have great reasons when things don't work out, but losers just have excuses. Dilbert: So... you can turn my excuses into great reasons by promoting me? Boss: No, because I can't promote you. Dilbert: That sounds like an excuse.

Rewarding Wally's Failures

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Rewarding Wally's Failures - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #failure, #excuse, #laziness, #justification, #reasoning, #excuses

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: You should be celebrating my failures instead of punishing me for them. Failure is the raw material of success. If I am not failing, it means I am not pushing myself hard enough. Boss: Fine. What have you failed at? Wally: I failed to work on my project this month.

Not That Invested In Your Success

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Not That Invested In Your Success - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #communication, #excuse, #excuses

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I made no progress on your project because I was waiting to ask you some questions. Coworker: You could have emailed me. Or texted me. Or stopped by my desk. Wally: I"m not that invested in your success.

Coworkers Hate Wally For Some Reason

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Coworkers Hate Wally For Some Reason - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #laziness, #work ethic, #excuses, #ego, #conceited, #productivity

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: My co-workers don't take me seriously because I'm so good looking. And I think they hate me for my brilliant mind. All I know is that they hate me. So if I seem unproductive, it's because of my beauty and brilliance.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #punctuality, #late, #excuses, #traffic, #sleep, #time management, #health

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Sorry I'm late. Traffic was terrible. Dilbert: Isn't the traffic from your house always terrible at this time of day? Tina: Exactly! That's why I'm late every day. Dilbert: Do you see any way you could fix that? Tina: I can't control the traffic. Dilbert: You could leave earlier. Tina: Then I wouldn't get enough sleep. Dilbert; You could go to bed earlier. Tina: Then I wouldn't have time to watch Netflix until two in the morning. Do you want me to hate my life? Dilbert: I didn't until now.

Wally Waits For People

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Waits For People - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #responsibility, #laziness, #work ethic, #excuses

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You accomplished nothing this month. Wally: I'm waiting for people to get back to me. I believe it is your job to make sure those other people do their jobs. Boss: I guess I could talk to them. Wally: I'll wait for you to get back to me.