Cold Dark Comic Strips - Page 4

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96 Results for Cold Dark

View 31 - 40 results for cold dark comic strips. Discover the best "Cold Dark" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags email monkey, cold turkey, little chatting, not addictive, hop on

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With a turkey attached to his back, Asok says to Dilbert "I used to have an e-mail monkey on my back, but I went cold turkey." Asok continues, "I still do a little chatting but that's not addictive. Is it?" A monkey approches Asok and introduces himself, "I'm Rofl." Asok replies, "Oh, just shut up and hop on."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags south pole, sending away, control freak, manipulating, sending dilbert, cold

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Noriko says to Dilbert, "I signed you up for a trip to the South Pole." Dilbert asks Noriko, "Um... why?" Noriko says to Dilbert, "You'll love it. You leave tomorrow." Dilbert says forcefully to Noriko, "I am not going to the South Pole!" Noriko says to Dilbert, "Oh, I get it; You're a control freak." Dilbert yells, "GAAA! Can't you see that it's you who is trying to control me?!! Noriko says to Dilbert, "All I see is you trying to manipulate me into not sending you to the South Pole." Dilbert, dressed in a fur-trimmed parka and carrying a suitcase, says to Catbert, "It seemed easier."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags look like losers, give numbers, internal subterfuge, eighty percent, vp

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There are several papers on a table. The Boss says to Dilbert, "We can't show these numbers to our VP. They make us look like losers." The Boss says to Dilbert, "Find something we're doing well and give him those numbers instead." Dilbert, wearing dark glasses and a false moustache, looks on as the VP reads the report and says, "Wow! Our internal subterfuge is up eighty percent!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating attractive men, dumb self centered, intelligent homely guy, gym, free weights, girl talk, Dilbert, Women

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Two women are at the gym. The dark haired says to the light haired, "I'm tired of dating attractive men who are dumb and self-centered." The dark haired continues, "Maybe I can find an intelligent homely guy and clean him up." The light haired exclaims, "No!!!" Dilbert approaches the women and asks, "Do you mind if I work in a set with those five-pounders?" The dark haired looks at Dilbert from the corner of her eye and smiles. The light haired screams, "Don't do it, Amber!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags complaints, dating, dog is perfect, improve, list, lose weight, need improvements, new odor, new wardrobe, polish up, new haircut, relationships

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The dark haired woman from the gym and Dilbert are sitting on the couch. Dogbert is sitting on the arm rest next to them. The woman says, "I made a list of all the ways you need to improve in order to keep dating me." Dilbert reads the list aloud: "Lose forty pounds, new wardrobe, new haircut, new car, new odor..." The woman interupts, "But your dog is perfect. How'd that happen?" Dogbert replies, "When can you move in?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags evil director, human resources, assistant recovers, cold or flu, should dissolved, winged demon, business

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The Boss says to Asok, "Asok, I want you to work for the evil director of human resources until his assistant recovers." Asok replies, "From what is he recovering? Is it a cold or perhaps a flu?" The Boss responds, "He saw so much evil that his soul dissolved and he became a winged demon."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags hostile bahavior, unacceptable body language, cold, eyebrows

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Catbert says to Tina, "Tina, we've gotten some complaints about your hostile behavior." Catbert continues, "At a recent meeting you crossed your arms. That is unacceptable body language." Tina furrows her brow and says, "Maybe I was cold." Catbert points and exclaims, "Eyebrows! Eyebrows!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags be there minute, sniffing, cough, cooties, direct hot, unclean, bugs, sneezed, motivation, looks like

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The Boss calls after Alice, "Tell everyone I'll be there in a minute." He makes a noise, "Sniff." Alice turns and asks, "What's all that sniffing about? Do you have a cold?" The Boss replies, "Little one." The Boss begins to shake and makes the noise, "Mmph." The Boss' mouth opens very widely and he coughs severely. Papers are blown all around; Alice is hit directly in the face with the cough. Alice exclaims, "Gaaa!!! I took a direct hit!" Alice continues, "The cooties are burrowing into my skin." Alice starts running and exclaims, "I'm unclean!!" The Boss and Catbert watch Alice. The Boss says to Catbert, "I hope that's what motivation looks like." Catbert replies, "Close enough."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cold, addicted, rx drugs, six months, coffeemaker

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Wally and Dilbert are at the coffee machine. Wally says, "I heard you had a cold." Dilbert responds, "It wasn't a cold." Dilbert continues, "I was addicted to prescription drugs and I grew an exoskeleton. I've been in rehab and surgery for six months." Wally responds, "Just to be clear: Can I catch any of that by touching the coffeemaker after you?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags stay home husband, support career, chocolate, hot and cold, bobby, didn't hear

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Alice says to the man in the apron, "Bobby, I'm looking for a stay-at-home husband to support my career." Bobby responds, "I'm sorry - I was thinking about chocloate, and I didn't hear a word you just said." Bobby walks away and says, "Br-r-r-r, I'm cold. Now I'm hot. Now I'm cold!" Alice thinks, "This will take some work."