Dating For A Year Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

501 Results for Dating For A Year

View 31 - 40 results for dating for a year comic strips. Discover the best "Dating For A Year" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #secrets, #Men, #dumb, #model, #hint, #boyfriend, #killer, #saturday, #woman, #dating

View Transcript

Transcript

The strip is titled, "The secrets of men. A guide for women." The caption says, "Women wonder why men say dumb things to start conversations." Dilbert asks a woman, "Are you a model?" The caption says, "Why can't men take a hint?" The woman replies, "No, but my boyfriend is a killer." The caption says, "Why are men so thick?" Dilbert asks, "Are you free Saturday?" The caption says, "Why are excuses useless?" The woman replies, "I have to wash my goldfish." Dilbert asks, "How about Sunday?" The caption says, "Why don't men understand the word no?" The woman says, "No no no no no no . . ." Dilbert asks, "What are you trying to say?" The caption says, "Men know why they act like that:" Dilbert and the woman look at each other. The caption says, ". . . Sometimes it works." Dilbert and the woman walk into the sunset holding hands.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #program, #predicts, #cost, #college, #rise, #twenty, #percent, #year, #orthodontia, #haircuts, #norway

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk working on his computer. Dilbert says, "My program predicts that the cost of college will rise twenty percent a year . . ." Dilbert continues, "Now, throw in the cost of orthodontia and haircuts . . ." Dilbert reads a printout and says to Dogbert, "I can either have a child or buy Norway . . ."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #sod, #wilson, #flogging, #dead, #hourses, #internal, #bureaucracy, #gouge, #customers, #attitude, #bad

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: It's going to be another year of flogging dead horses. But somehow we'll muddle through our internal bureaucracy, gouge our customers, and keep getting our tiny paychecks. Dilbert: Sir, Wilson turned into a clump of uninspired sod. The Boss: It's just as well; he had a bad attitude.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #woman, #edna, #protect, #planning, #boots, #cat, #dating

View Transcript

Transcript

A woman holding a cocktail glass says to another woman, "Uh-oh . . . That guy is coming to talk to us." Dilbert thinks, "I hate this long walk across the room." The woman says, "You're the ugly one, Edna. You'll have to protect me." Dilbert thinks, "They spotted me. They're planning a defense." The woman says to Edna, "I'll push you between us. You start babbling about your cat or something." Dilbert thinks, "I can't do it. I'll veer off at the last minute . . ." The woman shouts, "Now, Edna!" and pushes her. Edna falls and Dilbert trips over her. The woman thinks, "It's hard to be the pretty one." From the floor, Edna says, "I have a cat named Boots."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Wally, #Dilbert, #floyd, #success, #sharing, #contributing, #big hickey

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to Dilbert, "I see it's your turn to work with Floyd." Dilbert replies, "Yeah." Wally says, "He lived on my back for a year, sharing my successes without contributing." Wally says, "I had him lanced." Wally asks, "Does it leave a big hickey?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #dating, #problem, #writing, #down, #qualities, #girlfriend, #ballerina, #paw, #cramping

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dogbert says, "We have to approach your dating problem logically." Dogbert continues, "We'll begin by writing down all of the qualities you want in a girlfriend." Much later, Dogbert is still writing and there are stacks of paper on the table. Dilbert says, ". . . And she must be a ballerina." Dogbert says, "My paw is cramping."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ceo, #Dilbert, #the boss, #alice, #announcing, #staff, #reduction, #expenses, #paid, #year, #risky, #cut

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert and a woman, "Our CEO is announcing a ten-percent staff reduction to cut expenses." Dilbert raises his hand and asks, "Question: didn't our CEO get paid twenty million dollars this year?" The Boss replies, "Yes . . ." The Boss continues, "But risky jobs deserve higher pay." Dilbert raises his hand and asks, "Question: didn't you say WE were getting cut?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #dilemma, #single, #favor, #Women, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert says, "I have a solution for your dating dilemma." Dogbert continues, "At your age there are more single men than single women." Dogbert continues, "Worse yet, all of the single women are dating married men or serial killers." Dogbert continues, "But the statistics eventually favor men." Dilbert asks, "Really? How?" Dogbert replies, "At age 80 there are THREE TIMES as many available women as men because men die younger." Dilbert asks, "Are you saying I should wait until I'm old . . . And date 80-year-old women?" Dogbert says, "No. I wouldn't wait . . ."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #guide, #movie, #advertising, #thumbs, #nominated, #academy, #award, #stallone, #funniest, #masterpledge, #source, #farm

View Transcript

Transcript

The panel is titled, "Dogbert's Guide to Movie Advertisements." Dogbert says, "Trust me." The advertisement says, "'Thumbs up.' -Gene Siskel." Dogbert says, "Meaning: Roger Ebert hates it." The advertisement says, "'Nominated for an Academy Award.'" Dogbert says, "Notice they don't say for what -- probably 'Best Gaffer.'" The advertisement says, "'Funniest movie of the year.'" Dogbert says, "He saw it in mid-January." The advertisement says, "Four stars . . . A masterpiece!'" Dogbert says, "The movie studio only paid off one critic. Must be a low-budget film." The advertisement says, "'Powerful performances.'" Dogbert says, "It's a downer. Somebody probably gets a disease and loses the farm." The advertisement says, "'I loved it!' -Floyd Belcher, Nosehair Magazine." Dogbert says, "Remember to consider the source." The advertisement says, "Stallone's funniest movie yet." Dogbert says, "I think you get the hang of it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #europe, #brain, #nose, #woman, #uppity

View Transcript

Transcript

A woman says to Dilbert, ". . . So then I spent a year in Europe and blah blah blah blah." Dilbert says, "Hey, I think I can see your brain through your nose!" Dilbert says, "Anyway . . . You were saying . . . ?"