Existence Of Books Comic Strips - Page 4
Search Filters
Year
- 2022
- 2021
- 2020
- 2019
- 2018
- 2017
- 2016
- 2015
- 2014
- 2013
- 2012
- 2011
- 2010
- 2009
- 2008
- 2007
- 2006
- 2005
- 2004
- 2003
- 2002
- 2001
- 2000
- 1999
- 1998
- 1997
- 1996
- 1995
- 1994
- 1993
- 1992
- 1991
- 1990
- 1989
Character
50 Results for Existence Of Books
View 31 - 40 results for existence of books comic strips. Discover the best "Existence Of Books" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday October 25,
2005
Tags #specter of unpaid overtime, #guide you, #shadowy region, #neither life, #or death, #apparition, #ghost
Transcript
"I am the Specter of Unpaid Overtime." "I will guide you to the shadowy region that is neither life nor death. It is existence without meaning." "Where is this awful place?" "Right here. And if any sticky notes fall on the floor, I'll rake 'em up."
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Wednesday December 21,
2005
Tags #charging time, #projects, #no work, #wind, #existence of your wind, #farting around
Transcript
"Wally, you've been charging your time to several projects, but no one has ever seen you work." "You can't see the wind, either, but surely you don't doubt that it exists." "I've also gotten complaints about the existence of your wind." "I rest my case."
Tuesday March 21,
2006
Tags #executives, #hierarchy, #invisible, #managers, #status, #underling, #steering committee, #tall memebers, #senior menagement, #acknowledge exitence
Transcript
"Asok, I want you to attend the technology steering committee for me." "But they are all tall members of senior management. They won't even acknowledge my existence." "Phfft." "Hey, Andy, this seat is free. I'll just move my coffee."
Friday June 22,
2007
Tags #ignored, #coworker, #acknowledge existence, #uniportant, #talking clothes, #fretting, #mean, #anxiety
Transcript
Asok: "Alice, may I ask you a question? Alice? Alice?" Asok: "Gaaa! Am I so unimportant you feel no need to acknowledge my existence???" "Am I totally unimportant?" Catbert: "Hey, it's a bunch of talking clothes!"
Thursday August 07,
2008
Tags #financial bakery, #abuse, #zero units, #cook books, #foot notes, #smell like feet
Transcript
Dogbert says, "Welcome to 'Dogbert's Financial Bakery.' How may I abuse you?" A man says, "We shipped zero units this quarter. Can you cook our books?" Dogbert says, "Of course." The man says, "Will anyone know?" Dogbert says, "Sometimes the footnotes smell like actual feet."
Friday August 08,
2008
Tags #cooked books, #pension fund, #15% per year, #crooks, #optimists, #whistling noise, #soul escaping
Transcript
Dogbert says, "I cooked the books by assuming your pension fund will earn 15% per year." Pension Fund 15% Dogbert says, "Technically you aren't crooks, just optimists." Tweet! Mmph! Tweet! Dogbert says, "If you hear a whistling noise, that would be your soul escaping through your nose."
Wednesday April 13,
2011
Tags #appeal, #bad person, #business ethics, #comparison shopping, #guilt, #molt, #prevents competitors, #raising prices
Transcript
Dilbert: Our products only appeal to people who aren't good at comparison shopping. But I justify it because our existence prevents competitors from raising prices. Am I a bad person? Dogbert: I molt a little bit every time you talk.
Saturday April 07,
2012
Tags #business ethics, #agreements, #deals, #existence, #empire, #seem larger, #paycheck, #fair plan, #awful world, #balckmail, #boss, #employee
Transcript
Wally: IF you agree to give me no work, I will agree to not sue you with some sort of bogus employee claim. My existence will make your empire seem larger, and stockholders will get stuck with the bill for my paycheck. Boss: Why does that seem like a fair plan? Wally: We live in an awful world.
Monday April 23,
2012
Tags #business ethics, #lawyers & attorneys, #apps, #contact information, #users address books, #data, #office, #desk, #meeting, #store data, #business
Transcript
Coworker: Please tell me our apps don't steal contact information from our users' address books. Boss: We upload the data but we don't store it. Coworker: That's like saying I can date your wife if I put a bag over her head. Boss: That could work. Coworker: I don't think I'm getting through to you.
Monday April 30,
2012
Tags #how-to, #great leader, #book, #errors in book, #disgruntled underling, #existence, #break room
Transcript
Boss: I read a book about how to be a great leader, and realized I don't do any of those things. I'm surprised a book with so many errors could get published. It must have been written by a disgruntled underling. Wally: Do those exist?