Fifty Year Old Comic Strips - Page 4

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

598 Results for Fifty Year Old

View 31 - 40 results for fifty year old comic strips. Discover the best "Fifty Year Old" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ratbert, #friend, #Dogbert, #lab, #days, #lab rat, #experiement

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert walks along thinking, "I should go visit my old friend, Dogbert." Ratbert thinks, "I can get there in five days if I hurry." Ratbert walks through a maze in a lab. He thinks, "Lucky he's only a block away."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #sod, #wilson, #flogging, #dead, #hourses, #internal, #bureaucracy, #gouge, #customers, #attitude, #bad

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: It's going to be another year of flogging dead horses. But somehow we'll muddle through our internal bureaucracy, gouge our customers, and keep getting our tiny paychecks. Dilbert: Sir, Wilson turned into a clump of uninspired sod. The Boss: It's just as well; he had a bad attitude.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #comedy, #competition, #first, #joke, #old people, #dragged, #stage, #third place

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert asks Dilbert, "How did you do in the stand-up comedy competition?" Dilbert's clothes are tattered and he has bruises on his face. Dilbert replies, "I was halfway through my first joke -- about old people, when an elderly woman dragged me off stage and slapped the bejeezus out of me." Dilbert holds up a trophy and says, ". . . It was good enough for third place."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #car, #salesman, #woman, #old, #steal, #purse, #drive, #foot, #boss, #convince, #first born, #son, #relatives

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to a customer, "I asked the boss to sell it at your price." Dogbert continues, "He told me to drive over your foot and steal your purse." Dogbert continues, "Buy maybe I can convince him to take your first-born son instead." The woman says, "He IS my first-born son!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Wally, #Dilbert, #floyd, #success, #sharing, #contributing, #big hickey

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to Dilbert, "I see it's your turn to work with Floyd." Dilbert replies, "Yeah." Wally says, "He lived on my back for a year, sharing my successes without contributing." Wally says, "I had him lanced." Wally asks, "Does it leave a big hickey?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #gigabits, #megabits, #laughter, #fun-loving, #outside, #work

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and three co-workers sit at a conference table. A man says, "I think it was fifty gigabits." Another man replies, "I think you mean MEGabits." They all laugh, snort and giggle. Dilbert says, "We're so fun-loving, you'd think ONE of us would have a friend outside of work."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #fate, #steal, #dilberts, #hover-saucer, #conquer, #tiny, #nation, #elbonia, #knock, #unfriendly, #merger, #opportunity

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on his pillow. There is a knock at the door. Dogbert opens the door and an old man with a staff and a hat with an "F" on it stands on the doorstep. The man says, "Dogbert, I am 'Fate.' You must steal Dilbert's hover-saucer and conquer the tiny nation of Elbonia." Dogbert asks, "Since when does Fate knock?" The man replies, "I was bought out in an unfriendly merger by 'Opportunity.' I should have seen it coming."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #ceo, #old, #job, #stressful, #roses, #afford

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I stepped down as CEO and took my old job back - it's less stressful." Dogbert replies, "Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses." Dilbert says, "Exactly." Dogbert says, "Too bad we can't afford any roses now."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #couch, #problem, #therapy, #Dilbert, #mother, #mom, #evil, #swat

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert lies on a couch and his psychologist sits next to the couch taking notes. The therapist says, "Your problem is my mother." Dilbert asks, "YOUR mother? I don't even know your mother. How could she be my problem?" The psychiatrist says, "She's an evil woman and she lives under the couch." An old woman says, "What you need is a good swat!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ceo, #Dilbert, #the boss, #alice, #announcing, #staff, #reduction, #expenses, #paid, #year, #risky, #cut

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert and a woman, "Our CEO is announcing a ten-percent staff reduction to cut expenses." Dilbert raises his hand and asks, "Question: didn't our CEO get paid twenty million dollars this year?" The Boss replies, "Yes . . ." The Boss continues, "But risky jobs deserve higher pay." Dilbert raises his hand and asks, "Question: didn't you say WE were getting cut?"