Friends Explined Comic Strips - Page 4

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64 Results for Friends Explined

View 31 - 40 results for friends explined comic strips. Discover the best "Friends Explined" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 25, 2002's comic on:


Tags #michael t. suit, #core competencies, #platforms, #did we shake?

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A headless, handless man says to Dilbert, "Hi. My name is Michael T. Suit. All my friends call me M.T." M.T. continues, "I enhance core competencies by leveraging platforms." Dilbert is gone. M.T. continues, "Did we shake yet? Sometimes I can't tell."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 23, 2002's comic on:


Tags #boss, #errors, #flatter yourself, #forward to friends, #idiot boss, #spelling, #mass email

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The Boss types, "Trie to be moor prophesional in your commudicashuns." Dilbert and Wally read the email. Dilbert giggles at his computer, "Hee Hee!" Wally says, "Let's forward it to all our friends so they can see what an idiot we work for." Dilbert says, "But you're my only friend." Wally replies, "Don't flatter yourself."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 27, 2002's comic on:


Tags #one project, #finished one, #measure worth, #number of projects, #track roi, #losing, #competition amongst mothers, #dilberts mom

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Dilbert and his mom are eating dinner. Dilbert's mom asks, "Why have you only finished one project at work this year? Norma's son did three." Dilbert responds, "You can't measure someone's worth by counting the number of projects he does." Dilbert's mom says to her friends, "Maybe we should track R.O.I. instead." One of her friends replies, "Why, because you're losing?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 07, 2003's comic on:


Tags #exporting leprechaun meat, #cameras, #elbonians, #no excuse

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Headline: P.R. for Elbonia. Dogbert is standing on a table. He addresses two Elbonians, "The media give you a bad rap for exporting leprechaun meat." Dogbert continues, "Our ad campaign will feature a leprechaun explaining that they enjoy being eaten." Ratbert is dressed up like a leprechaun in front of cameras. He is standing in a frying pan and holding a meat tenderizer. He says, "Elbonians are our best friends. Now excuse me while I tenderize myself."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 24, 2004's comic on:


Tags #moving, #movers, #boxes, #hire movers, #feeling weak, #walk by myslef, #little legs, #unmanly

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Dilbert: It feels unmanly to hire movers. I should be able to do this with a few friends and a pick up truck. Dogbert: The movers just pulled up. Dilbert: I don't like being weak. I can walk by myself! mover: On this little legs?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 10, 2005's comic on:


Tags #stress hump, #no asignment, #no compeer no freinds, #resist, #the hump

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The New Employee "No assignment...no computer...no friends to talk to..." "It's just me and this huge stress hump." "Wazzup?" "Must...resist...urge...to name the hump...and talk to it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 26, 2005's comic on:


Tags #good advice, #balance, #personal life, #zen approach, #no freinds, #no work, #perfect balance, #zen, #faster

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Dilbert: "No one has any good advice on how I can balance my work with my personal life." Wally: "You didn't ask me." "I take the Zen approach of having no friends and doing no work. Hence, perfect balance." Dilbert: "Where did you get that definition of Zen?" wally: "I used to read, but it's faster to make up stuff."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 30, 2006's comic on:


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Today the company restated its earnings from 'a few frillion' to 'a loss of 1.3 billion'. "This would be humiliating if I had any friends." "Your strategy of being unattractive is paying off." "I'm ugly like a fox."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 04, 2007's comic on:


Tags #barbecue, #freinds, #no freinds, #make freinds, #jogger, #desparte, #meat, #social skills, #no social skills, #random, #Advice

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Dilbert: Maybe I should invite some friends over for a barbecue. Dogbert: "You don't have any friends." Dilbert: "Good point. Maybe I should make some friends first." Dogbert: "Exactly." Dogbert:"Do you like meat?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 04, 2007's comic on:


Tags #sales questions, #vice presdient, #talk to boss, #questions, #confusion, #chaos, #time management

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Wally: "Where do you think you're going?" Asok: "I need to ask our VP of sales a question." Wally: "Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!" "You can't speak directly with a vice president." "You need to talk to your boss, who talks to his boss, who talks to someone who is friends with the VP of sales, who then talks to him." Asok: "Wouldn't that virtually guarantee that the wrong question gets asked?" Wally: "It's better to have the right person ask the wrong question than the wrong person ask the right questions." Asok: "Do you have a minute?" The Boss: "Talk to my secretary."