Asok Comic Strips - Page 4
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Character
964 Results for Asok
View 31 - 40 results for Asok comic strips. Discover the best "Asok" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday May 17,
2020
Asok Meditates
Tags coffee, psychology, sarcasm, business, meditation, think, work, co-worker, technology, enlightenment
Transcript
asok: have you ever tried meditating? wally: sounds like a lot of work. asok: it is the opposite of work. all you have to do is sit in one place and think of nothing in particular. wally: can i drink coffee at the same time. asok: that is not recommended. wally: in other words, meditating is what i already do, but without the advantage of coffee? asok: perhaps you have already achieved enlightenment. wally: feels that way to me.
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Sunday May 10,
2020
Dogbert Teaches Asok Tech Support
Tags business, technology, train, tech support, problem, reboot, computer, problem solving, genius
Transcript
boss: dogbert, i need you to train asok to fill in for you on tech support. dogbert to asok: the goal of tech support is to convince the caller the problem is on their end. i do this by recommending increasingly difficult things for them to try. eventually they give up, watch and learn. dogbert on call: uh-huh... uh-huh... try rebooting your computer. now try it again while holding control -escape-space bar- delete for exactly 27.3 seconds. no luck? try looking at your computer's binary code to find any zeros and ones that are out of order. click dogbert: and he's gone. asok: genius!
Friday April 10,
2020
Asok Confidence
Tags asok, business, co-workers, confidence, enough, fake, room, test
Transcript
ask: you know what's wrong with this room? not enough of me in it. that's what. dilbert: are you testing your fake confidence? asok: is it working?
Monday March 23,
2020
Wise Person Said
Tags business, wise, person, boil, stick, egg, Advice, proverb, threat, overrate
Transcript
asok: a wise person once said you can't boil an egg with a stick. wally: no, but i can threaten you with a stick unless you boil an egg for me. asok: why didn't the wise person think of that? wally: he sounds overrated
Tuesday February 25,
2020
Pragmatist
Tags business, plans, office workers, stupid, pragmatist, practical, implement, technology
Transcript
asok: i'm a pragmatist. i like plans that are practical. wally: not me. i like plans that can't be implemented. way less work. asok: my way sounds stupid now.
Friday February 21,
2020
Expecting Excellence
Tags business, technology, happiness, expectations, coffee, dysfunction, excellence
Transcript
wally: asok, he key to happiness is lowering your expectations. for example, all i expect from work today is twelve cups of coffee and a humorous display of corporate dysfunction. asok: that sounds sad. wally: try expecting excellence and see how that works for you.
Thursday February 06,
2020
Slide Deck Too Well Designed
Tags business, managers & supervisors, office workers, tasks, well-designed
Transcript
boss: your slide deck is too well-designed. it suggests you spend too much time on things that are not important. asok: you don't give me important tasks. boss: that's no excuse for good design.
Thursday August 15,
2019
The Bad Analogy Guy
Tags meetings, office workers, sarcasm, war
Transcript
Man: This meeting reminds me of the sixth elbonian revolution. Therefore, logically, this meeting will end with bayonets. Asok: What's wrong with you? Man: Can I borrow your pen?
Saturday August 10,
2019
Asok Moves Into A Pod
Tags employment, finances, home, money, office workers, salary, apartment
Transcript
Asok: Thanks to my raise, I can afford to move out of my home in the men's restroom stall and into a pod. Dilbert: A pod? Asok: A pod! Dilbert: Is it better than the stall? Asok: It's smaller, but better appointed.
Sunday August 04,
2019
Circular Debating
Tags argument, debates, frustration, moon, conspiracy
Transcript
Wally: Thanks to my new circular debating technique. I haven't lost a debate in weeks. Watch this. The moon landing was a hoax. Man: No, it wasn't. Wally: The flag was moving in the wind. Man: I'll send you a link debunking the flag thing. Wally: Okay, but how do you explain the multiple light sources? Man: Here's another link debunking that claim. Fifteen minutes later Man: I have now debunked all ten of your ridiculous claims will you agree the moon landing was real? Wally: How do you explain the flag moving? Man: Gaaaa!!! I give up!! You win!!!


