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202 Results for Brain Stomring

View 31 - 40 results for brain stomring comic strips. Discover the best "Brain Stomring" comics from Dilbert.com.

P Ity The Windowless

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P Ity The Windowless - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 24, 2016's comic on:


Tags #cubicle, #office, #office workers, #location, #window, #ego, #superiority

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Tina: Do you think you're better than me just because you have a cubicle with a window? Wally: Yes. Continuous exposure to new stimuli makes my brain create useful pathways and connections. Tina: I did not see that coming. Wally: I pity the windowless.

Ted Has Fly Brain

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Ted Has Fly Brain - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 09, 2016's comic on:


Tags #greeting card, #sick, #brain damage, #marketing, #advertising, #mindless, #business, #medical

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Carol: Sign this card for Ted. A fly went up his nose and laid eggs in his brain. Dilbert: Is he coming back to work? Carol: We think he'll live out his days in Marketing.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 26, 2016's comic on:


Tags #goals, #accomplishment, #consciousness, #death, #achievement, #medical

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Dilbert: Do you have any long-term goals? Wally: Just death. Dilbert: Death isn't a goal. Wally: It's the best kind. This way, I can go out as a winner. With my last breath, I plan to do a fist pump and yell, "I did it!" What's your long-term plan? Dilbert: I plan to use brain imaging technology to map my mind. Then I'll create a digital copy of myself to live forever in a software simulation. Unless I already did. Wally: Give yourself a fist pump, just in case.

Hat Monitors Sleep

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Hat Monitors Sleep - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 06, 2016's comic on:


Tags #mind control, #technology, #invention, #hat, #control

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Boss: This hat monitors your brain waves and warns you if you are going to fall asleep. We think it will prevent accidents. Dilbert: Is that all it does? Boss: For now. Robot: Welcome to the club.

Soulless Container Of Knowledge

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Soulless Container Of Knowledge - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 05, 2016's comic on:


Tags #robots, #artificial intelligence, #emotions, #humanity, #feelings

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Robot: Wally asked me to scan his brain and download his thoughts so I can attend meetings on his behalf. Boss: But all you are is a soulless container of knowledge. Robot: That's all Wally is, too. Boss: Stop trying to alter my worldview. Robot: Well, look who doesn't like being programmed.

Humans Hold Domininion

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Humans Hold Domininion - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 21, 2016's comic on:


Tags #temperature, #humans, #nature, #thermostat, #robots, #technology, #evolution, #fragility

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Dilbert: My brain won't work when the office is warmer than 72. Carol: It has to be at least 74 or I'll freeze. Robot: What's it like to hold dominion over the Earth within a narrow band of temperatures that can't coexist? Dilbert: Was that a joke? Carol: I'm too cold to think?

How It Would Be With Robots In Charge

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How It Would Be With Robots In Charge - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 05, 2015's comic on:


Tags #technology, #slave, #enslavement, #power, #responsibility, #laziness, #work ethic, #annoyance, #frustration

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Robot: Buwhahahaha! I will use my superior robot brain to enslave humankind! Wally: That probably sounds better than it would actually be. How It Would Be: Wally: I'm tired. I need to recharge. Robot: Gaaaa!!! I hate owning you!

Wally Thinks Twice As Hard

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Wally Thinks Twice As Hard - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 26, 2015's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #motivation, #trick, #deception, #excuse, #lazy, #energy, #con, #health

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Wally: I'm working twice as hard as ever before. Most of it is happening inside my head. But trust me, my brain is working double-time. Boss: Um... that's great. Wally: Obviously, I need to work fewer hours because of the energy drain.

Wally Gets Nano Robot Injection

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Wally Gets Nano Robot Injection - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 28, 2015's comic on:


Tags #nanorobot, #nanobot, #health, #motivation, #work ethic

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Catbert: For our employee wellness program we will inject nanorobots into your bloodstream to keep you free of disease. The nanorobots will also rewire your brain to make you a more effective worker. You might even feel motivated. Wally: Those robots are going to be disappointed.

Dilbert And The Prison Gang

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Dilbert And The Prison Gang - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 22, 2015's comic on:


Tags #prison, #lawyer, #attorney, #Advice, #plead, #trial, #crime, #murder, #technicality, #guilt, #legal

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Dogbert: Your brain stimulator invention turned you into a murderer. I will argue that you can't get a fail trial by jury of your peers because all of the people like you are already in jail for doing their own stupid stuff. And I signed you up for a prison gang. All you need to do is skin a snitch.