Computers Comic Strips - Page 4
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Character
97 Results for Computers
View 31 - 40 results for computers comic strips. Discover the best "Computers " comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday September 07,
2011
Tags business ethics, computers & peripherals, software, install and test, database software, engineering
Transcript
Dogbert consults Dogbert: I recommend that you buy the Dogbert database software. Boss: Did I just pay a consultant to recommend his own company's software? Dogbert: I'm totally objective. Boss: Who would install and test it? Dogbert: Maybe a consultant who knows the product?
Wednesday August 03,
2011
Tags computers & peripherals, gadgets, intergenerational relations, grandpa box, phones, tablets, laptop, text the 90s
Transcript
Asok: Are you getting a lot done on the grandpa box? Dilbert: The what? Asok: The people in my generation do our work on our phones and tablets. Dilbert: I also have a laptop. Asok: I'll text the nineties and let them know.
Monday August 01,
2011
Tags actions & defenses, computers & peripherals, internet & world wide web, international data security standards group, security prcedures, bed sores
Transcript
Boss: Dogbert is chairing the international data security standards group. Dogbert: The goal of our organizations is to make your security procedures so inconvenient that you give up hope and die from bed sores. We take pride in being independent from the companies that fund us.
Friday June 24,
2011
Tags computers & peripherals, internet & world wide web, fake links, boost search rank, dung for barins, shut your pie hole
Transcript
Dilbert: Google found out that we used fake links to boost our search rank. Now our website only shows up when someone enters the search string "dung for brains." Boss: They won't get away with this! Computer: Shut your pie hole.
Sunday June 12,
2011
Tags computers & peripherals, machinery, office equipment, prototype, traffic, traffic load test, ask lab, didn't ask lab
Transcript
Boss: Did you ask the lab if they have a way to test traffic loads on our prototype? Dilbert: I met with them for an hour and explained that we need traffic load tests. Boss: But you didn't actually ask if they could do the tests? Dilbert: Well... no... but... it's their job to do the tests. And they would have mentioned it if they didn't have a way to do it. Boss: But you didn't ask. Dilbert: That was the context of the meeting. If they couldn't do that sort of test they would have mentioned it sometime during our hour together. Boss: Maybe you should ask. Dilbert: Gaa!! Okay! I'll ask! Are you freakin' kidding me?!! Man: I wondered why you didn't ask.
Thursday June 09,
2011
Tags absent mindedness, computers & peripherals, unix servers, new servers, new names
Transcript
Wally: This week I renamed all of the Unix servers to make them easier to remember. In phase one, the new names exist only in my mind. I won't know if they're easy to remember until next week. Dilbert: How are the new server names? Wally: I don't know what you're talking about. Next week.
Tuesday May 24,
2011
Tags computers & peripherals, internet & world wide web, firewall down, viruses, spyware, tuberculosis, zombies, deposed dictator, iphone 3gs, army of mole people
Transcript
Dilbert: Our firewall is down. Some bad stuff is getting through. Boss: How bad? Dilbert: So far we've seen viruses, spyware, tuberculosis, zombies, a deposed dictator, and an iPhone 3GS. Update: an army of mole people from another dimension has tunneled through. Boss: Keep me informed.
Monday May 23,
2011
Tags computers & peripherals, internet & world wide web, coupons, email, firewall, malicious complience, downside, dogs of hell
Transcript
Boss: Mordac, I'm not getting the coupons by email that I signed up for. Can you dial back the firewall or something? Mordac: Absolutely. There's nothing I enjoy more than malicious compliance with your requests. Boss: Is there any downside? Mordac: UNLEASH THE DOGS OF HELL!
Friday May 20,
2011
Tags computers & peripherals, language, no longer undertsnd, employees, to of touch, technology, gravitons, warp drive, rebalanced, subspace responders, business
Transcript
Boss: I no longer understand anything my employees say. I must be so out of touch with technology that I don't even recognize the words. Wally: I flushed the gravitons out of the warp drive and rebalanced the subspace responders.
Monday May 16,
2011
Tags computers & peripherals, frustration, coding, users specifications, technology
Transcript
Boss: Did I remember to tell you before you finished the coding that the user's specifications changed? Dilbert: AAAIII-YIIIII-YIIII-YIII!!! Boss: So, no-ish? Dilbert: BAM! BAM! BAM!


